Final Fantasy N1 Results (Dec. 28, 2021) - Indianapolis, IN

We see the start screen for a classic 8-bit video game menu for LVL UP WRESTLING come onto our screen. It says Press Start. We do. And we see the screen static as the opening video package plays.



As the epic hype promo package from the Level Up Promo Team completes we see an outside shot of the Gainbridge Fieldhouse in Indianapolis, Indiana! We cut to inside to the famous drone cam shot as it flies around the arena catching the fans, the excitement, and the sheer electricity in the air for the first night of this two night PPV Extravaganza! We see signs littering the crowd "WALUIGI WORLD ORDER!", "GIT GOOD!" ,"I GAVE HER THE BERT AND SHE GAVE ME THE HURT!", "TEAM THICCNESS GOT BIG D***NESS!!", "DON'T BE DISRESPECTFUL", "MARY X ARTIE IS MY OTP", and many more as the we fly around and land at the commentary table. Arthur La Forge is wearing a black tuxedo like number with a sparkling gold bow tie. The suit jacket looking like his Captain N Letterman's Jacket he always wears. Next to him is Mary De Sue, dressed in a really elegant and beautiful version of an Aerith Gainsborough cosplay from Final Fantasy VII. The two wave to the fans for a moment as the fanfare starts to die down.

Arthur La Forge: It's finally here! The Epic Two Night Level Up Pay Per View Of The Year! Final Fantasy Night One is here! And we are live! Isn't this great Mary?

Mary DeSue: It's going to be a great night for sure Artie, mainly because I just got word that the Level Up Twitch Channel has now gotten a record One Point Five Million Subscribers within the last twenty four hours!

Arthur La Forge: That's amazing news Mary! And tonight folks you're going to see Level Up Wrestling at it's best, and kicking things off tonight we have an amazing debue match of Natsumi Rekara taking on our very own, 'Queen of Strong Style' Amber Payne in an opening bout that is sure to excite everyone!

Mary DeSue: That's great Artie but what about...

Arthur La Forge: Then we have the team of PEEZEE, Valentine, and Andriod 69 taking on all three members of James Wilcox's diabolical trio of terror...The Faction!

Mary DeSue: Great, but what about...

Arthur La Forge: The Fatal Fourway?? I'm glad you asked. We got Lord Raab, Joey Crash, Emily Simms, and Kat Jones going to come to blows, but the winner of that bout Mary gets to look ahead to "The Last Of Us" next year...because they will be the final spot in the titular TLOU MAIN EVENT!!!

Mary DeSue:...Holy crap we're doing that insane match again? Who approved this?

Arthur La Forge: The Developer of course...just like he approved Chelsea Skye taking on Victoria Salinas in a one on one bout right afterwards. And then Mary...I'll let you announce this one...

Mary DeSue: What? Really?

Arthur La Forge: I insist.

Mary DeSue: You are a real sweetheart sometimes Artie. In what I consider to be the true main event of the evening we will see "The Beauty and The Bong" defend...AND LOSE TO TEAM THICCNESS!! IT WILL HAPPEN TONIGHT FOLKS! I SWEAR!!

Arthur La Forge: My partner's bias aside this match is the only title match of the evening, but don't let that make you think Night One doesn't have an exciting main event. Oh no. We got a multifederation fight on our hands with UGWC's Centurion taking on our very own Larry Tact

Mary DeSue: Oh who cares about Centrum Silver taking on Larbear...TEAM THICCNESS!!!

Arthur La Forge: And with that let's get this epic night on the way...

Mary DeSue: LET'S GO B(BLEEP)TCHES!

---

Amber Payne vs. Natsumi Rekara

“Carol of the Bells” by Lindsey Stirling plays over the arena speakers and the crowd gives a positive reaction for the start of the action, and a new challenger making her debut.

Mr. Rad: The following is the opening m-match of Final Fantasy… Nigh-ight One!! Introducing first, making her Level Up Wrestling d-de-debut… from Chiyoda, Japan and weighing in at 109 pounds… Natsumi Rekara!

Mary DeSue: Mr. Rad still having some technical difficulties.

Arthur LaForge: It began a glitchy A.I., and why stop at the end of our first year? Seems fitting in a way.

Mary DeSue: Only you would get sentimental from a glitching A.I., Artie. Never change.

The lights turn pink and white, as the docile tones of “Carol of the Bells” begin to play and Natsumi walks onto the stage. Spinning around, she closes her eyes before extending her arms out and letting everything sink in, before reopening them and gracefully moving her arms around as she does another twirl before beginning to make her way down to the ring. Feeling knots in her stomach, she takes a few deep breaths to compose herself, before bowing and clasping her hands in a prayer sort of gesture before standing up and continuing to walk down the ramp. She then makes her way over to the stairs nearest to her, walking up them before entering the ring and bowing once more before twirling and gracefully extending her arms as “Carol of the Bells” ends.

Arthur LaForge: The fans are going to release all the energy that’s been building towards these two nights. I know I’m ready!

Mary DeSue: I’m sure you and these fans know all about pent up tension.

Arthur LaForge: I don’t follow…

Mary DeSue: Maybe this new girl can help you with that.

Arthur LaForge: First, please stop. Second, she’s a teenager! Wait, aren’t you the one always fawning over…

Mary DeSue: I have taste, Artie! THICC tastes. Enough of your banter, focus on who’s coming to take new girl down.

Arthur LaForge: No doubt, Natsumi Rekara will have a test tonight in her first Level Up match.

“The Sentinel” by Celldweller begins playing and the lights go out…music slowly coming on as Amber steps out from the back and slowly walks down towards the ring. Her hands in the pockets of her vest. As the music picks up, she slides in the ring, stands up and stands in the middle of the ring. As the drums hit, she stands there… then puts her arms out, head up looking at the ceiling. As the electronic beats comes, she leans her head down and looks at the hardcam. She turns her head facing Natsumi Rekara, no expression on her face. She turns quickly and back tracks into her corner. Taking her vest off as she keeps her eyes on Rekara.

Mr. Rad: And her opponent, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and weighing in at 150 pounds… Amber Payne!

Arthur LaForge: Amber Payne has had an up-and-down tenure in Level Up, and she needs to take Natsumi seriously.

Mary DeSue: That’s being nice to the newbie. Amber is strong style and could break the new girl in real good tonight.

Arthur LaForge: Natsumi is versed in Joshi strong style. It should make for a clash of similar wrestling philosophies.

Mary DeSue: Maybe, or Amber could just take her down.

The two circle in the ring, Natsumi perhaps experiencing jitters as she takes a grand stage for her debut. Amber has plenty on her mind, too, but recognizes the hesitation of Natsumi and decides to charge into a grapple. Natsumi is forced back into the ropes and the referee calls for a break. Amber grants it but then hits a chop to the chest of Natsumi. Payne stops at the one chop, backing up at the referee’s caution although not without a few choice words for her opponent. Natsumi comes back to the center of the ring and the two lockup again. Amber sinks in a headlock and Natsumi lifts her, flashing some strength, but cannot immediately get Amber off from this position. She again tries to lift her and Payne jabs her in the head using her free hand. Natsumi accomplished what she wanted, though, getting within reach of the ropes to break the hold. Amber does so at the referee’s count of three.

Arthur LaForge: Amber Payne testing Natsumi here early on, and Rekara is faring just fine.

Mary DeSue: Next time it won’t be a simple knock on her head, guaranteed.

As Natsumi rubs her throat and looks back up, she finds Amber standing right in front of her. Payne square on SLAPS Natsumi across the face! Rekara’s head snaps to one side and she looks shocked as Amber laughs and the referee backs her off from the ropes.

Mary DeSue: There’s your welcome to Level Up Wrestling, new girl!

Arthur LaForge: She has a name, you know. Natsumi Rekara.

Mary DeSue: New girl is all she deserves because after tonight, she may be leaving quicker than her head turned on that slap. Who needs to remember a name that was barely here?

Amber doesn’t waste much time, as soon as the referee gets out of the way she charges Natsumi with a European uppercut. Natsumi tries moving and takes it in the chest, sending her stumbling. Amber quickly hooks Natsumi and hits a Suplex, then runs the ropes. As Natsumi is getting up Amber goes for a Shining Wizard! Rekara barely rolls out of the way and then attempts a spinning heel kick but Amber ducks it and Rekara lands on the mat. Amber comes off the ropes from behind and then HITS the Shining Wizard! A cover from Payne…

One!

Two!

Kickout!

Arthur LaForge: It seems Natsumi Rekara is having a bit of trouble getting out of the blocks, and she got hit with one of Amber Payne’s stronger moves.

Mary DeSue: New girl is going to be behind the 8-ball before we knew her.

Amber waits for Natsumi to get back up, and then hooks her in a Fisherman’s grapple, perhaps setting up her finisher but Rekara immediately lands strikes to Payne’s midsection and breaks the hold. She takes a step back but Amber follows in and SLAPS HER AGAIN! The crowd begins booing Amber for her actions and she laughs back at them.

Mary DeSue: So nice it was worth seeing twice!

Arthur LaForge: It’s clear there’s no respect coming from Amber Payne to…

Arthur stops as Natsumi turns her head back to look fiercely at Amber. She then unleashes a series of jabs and strikes to Amber’s midsection, finishing with an uppercut! Natsumi yells out and the crowd gives some cheers in return! Amber goes for a Superkick and Natsumi sidesteps, shooting off the ropes and now hitting the spinning heel kick. She then follows up with another several quick jabs that stun Amber, who goes for a clothesline unsuccessfully as Natsumi ducks under and when Amber turns around, Rekara comes down on her with a Crescent Kick that sends Amber to her knees! As Payne rises, Natsumi goes for “The Girl in the Mirror” Floatover DDT… but Amber shoves her off! Natsumi does not relent, running in again and… gets caught with a Low Altitude Roundhouse Kick! Rekara is down and Amber goes for another pinfall…

One!

Two!!

Th— KICKOUT![/i]

Arthur LaForge: This has picked up since the early goings, but you can tell Amber Payne has an experience advantage. When Natusmi got something going, she was able to snub it out.

Mary DeSue: She has experience and 40 pounds on the little girl… see, I’m putting forth effort here, Artie.

Arthur LaForge: New girl and little girl?

Mary DeSue: Two names for an otherwise no-name in wrestling. That’s extra nice of me.

Arthur LaForge: I think you’re missing the point entirely.

Amber smacks the mat, staring daggers at the referee but getting back up and waiting on Natsumi. As Rekara gets to her feet, Amber takes her right back down with a spear. She then heads to the top rope, lining up her opponent for a 450 Splash… Natsumi gets her knees up!! Amber bounces off and lands on the mat curled up. When she gets back up, Natsumi immediately grabs her and lands a few knee strikes. She then lands a suplex and as Amber gets back on her feet, Natsumi looks poised… “Girl In The Mirror” Floatover DDT! Cover by Rekara…

One!

Two!!

AMBER KICKS OUT!

Arthur LaForge: An impressive counter and counteroffensive from Natsumi Rekara in her debut.

Mary DeSue: Still only a two count. Three’s the magic number!

Arthur LaForge: Yes, but you can see Natsumi begin to get her footing.

Rekara intends on staying in control, applying a neck wrench and squeezing Amber. Payne yelps out in pain and tries to shuffle towards the ropes but Natsumi clamps down harder. Seeing Rekara leaning into the hold, Amber in desperation pokes an eye of Rekara! Natsumi immediately releases the hold, clutching her eye and stumbling around the ring. She comes back around to Amber… Fisherman’s Swinging Neckbreaker! Cover by Amber Payne…

One!

Two!!

THR—NO! NATSUMI GETS A SHOULDER UP!

Mary DeSue: Come on, ref!

Arthur LaForge: Don’t let it go unnoticed, we are seeing resiliency from Natsumi Rekara in her debut. These are some of Amber’s signature moves she has taken and survived.

Mary DeSue: She may be a little sparkplug… hey, that’s three names!

Arthur LaForge: *Sigh*

Amber has a look of surprise written across her face. She shakes her head and grabs Natsumi by the arm, wrenching her towards the ropes. She slides onto the apron and reaches a leg in to stomp on Natsumi, keeping her down as Amber drags her until an arm is laying on the apron. Amber stomps her foot on the apron as the fans boo her, seeing what lies ahead.

Arthur LaForge: What is she doing?

Mary DeSue: I think Amber has decided to kick off this little sparkplug’s Level Up career off by putting her on the shelf!

Arthur LaForge: Although it could set up Amber’s Rings of Payne submission, the apron part of the ring has zero give. A strike there could altogether injure Natsumi!

Mary DeSue: Welp, she should have stayed the hell down then.

Amber goes for a stomp on Natsumi’s arm, and misses! Natsumi pulls her arm back in and Amber limps momentarily from the force of hitting the apron. Natsumi suddenly comes in and launches herself between the ropes and into the kidneys of Amber Payne! Amber falls to her knees in pain and Natsumi gets her under the bottom rope and back in the ring.

Mary DeSue: What a cheap shot! Maybe there’s hope for this one yet.

Arthur LaForge: What rule did she break?

Mary DeSue: The rule… of… a-attacking someone on the apron without permission!

Arthur LaForge: That is most definitely not a rule.

Mary DeSue: Rude.

Amber misses with a wild swing at Natsumi, who then lands quick jabs again to the abdomen of Amber. She then hits a front kick that focuses again on the abdomen, and hooks Amber for a suplex. Payne hooks her leg, preventing the suplex, and then again. She hits several strikes to Natsumi’s side and hit a suplex of her own, but holds her side and the two get up at roughly the same time. A THIRD SLAP by Amber! Natsumi has had enough and hits a chop… then a knee strike bends Amber… then another chop sends her reeling back! Chop! Knee strike! Chop! “Crossed upon the Stars” Flatliner!! Natsumi gracefully grabbed Amber in the midst of her flurry and sent her crashing to the mat. Natsumi screams in fury and the crowd is digging her energy, cheering Rekara on! She steadies herself, waiting on Amber to stand… “Blade of Thorns” Roundhouse Kick!! Natsumi continues to feed off the crowd, and picks Amber up, who is clearly out of it.

Arthur LaForge: GLISTENING DIVINE!!! Natsumi Rekara drills Amber Payne with her Bridging Fisherman's Suplex and makes a cover!

One!

Two!!

THREE!!!

Mr. Rad: The winner of the first-ever match at Final Fantasy… NATSUUUMIIII REKAAAAARRRRRAAAA!!!

Arthur LaForge: Natsumi Rekara with a great effort in her debut, weathering the storm of Amber Payne and flashing her arsenal on the way to victory.

Mary DeSue: Okay, let’s not crown her Final Boss or anything. It was one match. She can stick around.

Arthur LaForge: Amber Payne couldn’t quite stop the emergence of our latest signee. Better learn this young lady’s name, folks. Natsumi Rekara’s story is just getting started.

---

PEEZEE, Android 69 & Valentine vs. The Faction

"Koochy" by Armand Van Helden plays and 13 seconds in, the words "Android 69" appear on the screen prompting a mixed reaction from the crowd. Once the robotic voice begins "singing", The Masked Machinist comes out, remote control in hand, fidgeting with it before turning it back towards the Gorilla position. Then, out comes none other than Android 69 doing the robot, which he invented, as well as pelvic thrusting towards the ladies of this fine city... but only if they consent... which they always do. MM keeps trying to get A69 back on track, until they've finally reached the ring. A69 begins dry-humping the corner turnbuckle until MM turns a dial on his remote, programming his robot for professional wrestling action!

Mr. Rad: The following is a six per… uh… six… Being multiplayer match! Introducing first, accompanied by the Masked Machinist and billed from Fucking, Austria, they weigh in at 235 pounds… they have been called ‘The Literal Sex Machine’ … ‘Coitus Maximus’ … it is Android 69!

Arthur LaForge: Mr. Rad having to do a little on-the-fly reprogramming with the intro for our only resident non-human on the roster.

Mary DeSue: If you want to count Jenovah as a person.

”Left Outside Alone” by Blind Channel plays and once it kicks off, Valentine slowly walks to the ring in dim lighting, with the crowd giving some supportive chants.

Mr. Rad: Introducing their partner, from Birmingham, England and weighing in at 125 pounds… VALENTINE!

Arthur LaForge: Android 69 fared well in his debut at EXP 18, teaming with PEEZEE as he will again tonight. The mysterious Valentine will complete their trio for this match.

Mary DeSue: This guy flies so far under the radar, we didn’t even hear from him ahead of Final Fantasy.

Arthur LaForge: True, it’s been quiet on the Valentine front, but you can expect him to fight for the people alongside his teammates. He should strengthen this team against the established Faction, led by James Wilcox.

Mary DeSue: The Faction is CreepyAF but they’re as Level Up brand as almost anyone. James debuted at EXP 3 so he’s practically an OG.

Arthur LaForge: Wow, that’s some great research, Mary.

Mary DeSue: You lost me there… did you say word search? Your BoringAF nerd refs are going to put our audience to sleep, Artie.

Arthur LaForge: You… you do know we are a video game themed wrestling company, right?

“Purple Hills” by D-12 plays as the fans await the entrance of the mammoth PEEZEE.

Mr. Rad: Introducing next, from Nashville, Tennessee and weighing in at 415 pounds… PEEZEE!

After a little while, a murmur begins amidst the crowd as PEEZEE is nowhere to be seen. The Masked Machinist and Valentine begin huddling as Android 69 looks to be ‘courting’ (see: thrusting) towards some female fans at ringside.

Mary DeSue: Hey, where’s my inside connection? I mean… the holistic medicine man?

Arthur LaForge: We didn’t hear a peep from PEEZEE, either, leading up to Final Fantasy… wait, I’m hearing we have a camera crew that spotted an altercation backstage. Let’s send it to them.

The big screen fires up in the arena to show a backstage area clouded in what appears to be smoke. We can make out some motions, and as the camera moves closer we find PEEZEE clubbing at the bodies of Drake Wilcox and ISAAC. It seems they have him pinned to a wall, but PEEZEE is still fighting. He lands a nasty elbow to the base of ISAAC’s neck, causing him to clutch it and back off. He then headbutts the back of Drake Wilcox’s head a couple times, allowing him to break free. PEEZEE quickly lunges at ISAAC and hits a Lariat! He then turns and lifts Drake Wilcox onto his shoulder, possibly for a Samoan Drop on the floor. No! Drake fights against it with elbows of his own. PEEZEE struggles to steady himself with the weight of Drake… and quickly ‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox appears and takes a clear shot with THE WAND!! His signature sledgehammer is driven straight into the abdomen of PEEZEE and as gigantic as he is, even the big man cannot hold Drake Wilcox after the shot. Drake lands on his feet behind PEEZEE and quickly grabs hold of him, then ISAAC returns and takes a couple cheap shots before they both hold PEEZEE. James makes a couple symbolic gestures with his hand.

‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox: Rest easy. In absentia lucis, Tenebrae vincunt. We have arrived to deliver your contribution to the darkness!

A wild look creases onto James’ face and he SMASHES THE WAND INTO THE HEAD OF PEEZEE! ANOTHER BLOW SENDS PEEZEE DOWN TO THE FLOOR!

Arthur LaForge: An all-out assault on PEEZEE has left him seemingly incapacitated! What does this mean for the match?

Mary DeSue: Well the match hasn’t started yet, Artie, so it’s all fair game. No harm, no foul!

Arthur LaForge: I’m seeing the Faction do plenty of harm to PEEZEE!

Mary DeSue: You know, I never did understand that phrasing. Must be a dumb sports ref.

Arthur LaForge: Uh, yes. Yes, it is. Wait, here comes PEEZEE’s team!

Indeed, Valentine dives onto James Wilcox, punching him to the ground and sending the Wand sprawling away. Drake and ISAAC watch as the Masked Machinist trails behind Valentine, pushing buttons on his remote control to bring along Android 69, who has continued his thrusting course. The Masked Machinist slowly looks up and sees the monstrous Drake and ISAAC glaring down at him, and gulps. They try to grab the remote and MM cries out in protest. Finally, A69 has kicked into gear and runs right into ISAAC with a Robot Splash that send him to the ground! Drake turned his attention to Valentine, running and punt kicking him in the ribs to knock him off James Wilcox. Drake then STEPS ON VALENTINE! This causes the masked man to scream in agony and when Drake decides to step off of him, Valentine grabs his ribs and rolls around in substantial pain.

Arthur LaForge: Mother Brain! This is carnage as the Faction is decimating their team before the match even begins.

Mary DeSue: I’m sorry, lost again… did you say Mother Brain?

Arthur LaForge: You don’t even know what my jacket means, do you.

Mary DeSue: Well, I was hoping you weren’t some nerd cult member.

Arthur LaForge: Mary! It’s not… I wouldn’t call it… you know what? Let’s keep up with the action.

Android 69 has taken the advantage over ISAAC, knocking him down the hallway while James menaces MM with the Wand. Drake sends a hobbled Valentine right at A69… but A69 manages to get ISAAC in the way! Valentine uses his agility to get on the back of ISAAC, who tries throwing him off and ends up being bulldogged onto the floor! James sees this and comes at Valentine, but A69 steps in the way and James looks at the being, hesitating. He scowls and leaps at A69, only to be caught with a Robot Punch! James staggers towards the curtain and Drake comes with a head of steam at A69 and a big boot… A69 evades and Drake waylays ISAAC! The Faction member goes into a wall next to the curtain and as James and Drake check on their fallen teammate, A69 nails both he and James with a DOUBLE JOI BUZZER! The Electrified Grab sends James staggering through the curtain, while Drake runs around in a circle as if he was stung by several hornets.

Arthur LaForge: The Masked Machinist’s creation is hardly conventional, but they’re super effective!

Mary DeSue: Oh, wait! I know that reference.

Arthur LaForge: Really?

Mary DeSue: Yeah, it’s from Digimon, right?

Arthur LaForge: … No.

Mary DeSue: Hold on, no, I meant… Pikmin.

Arthur LaForge: *smacks face, almost loses headset*

Mary DeSue: A friend showed me that game. Those little colored people running around? Ha! What a TRIP after you pop a couple gummies.

Arthur LaForge: It’s night one of Final Fantasy and we may get banned from Twitch.

Mary DeSue: What?! It’s just a game, Artie. They don’t have any deep meanings. It’s all pew-pew, explosions, shooting people, and walking aimlessly around fantasy worlds. Oh, and sports games which is all fake.

Arthur LaForge: Mo-ther F… Brain. Mother Brain.

The brawl continues down to ringside, where the referee is trying to restore order. MM is not helping, screaming at A69 to protect him instead of being distracted once more by the temptation of entertaining (thrusting) for women in the audience. It doesn’t help when Drake and plows into A69 with a body attack that sends them over the railing into fans. They are checking on him and being so close to a couple ladies, A69 begins really getting excited, vibrating throughout their metal body. Meanwhile, Valentine is being double-teamed by James and ISAAC. ISAAC attempts a back suplex and Valentine manages to land on his feet. Valentine springs off the railing and manages to hit James with a cross body that takes him to the floor. He then leaps onto the apron and goes for a springboard moonsault on ISAAC… taking the bigger man down! Just as he is getting fired up, Drake grabs him from behind and throws Valentine into the railing! James recovers and the two stomp on Valentine before rolling him into the ring, James following in and the other Faction members climbing onto the apron. The referee, seeing a rare opportunity, signals to the timekeeper.

Mary DeSue: Did this match just start? I was hoping it would be over so we could move on to THICCER matters.

Arthur LaForge: The match has officially started, but who knows how much is left in the tanks after that brawl.

Mary DeSue: As long as the freaky robot and pervy creator stay on the other side of the ring. I have enough Insta followers like them!

James resumes his attack, hoisting Valentine into the tree of woe. He tags in his Faction teammate ISAAC, who comes in and lands a few stomps of his own before tagging Drake Wilcox, who repeats this. They go in a carousel-like tagging and stomping on Valentine for a solid minute, with James also raising his arms to the crowd and receiving a healthy amount of jeers for his posturing. ISAAC then lifts Valentine directly from the Tree of Woe onto his shoulder, setting him on the top turnbuckle. He ascends to the second rope, slapping his helpless opponent 3 times before landing a huge headbutt. Drake tags ISAAC’s leg while this is happening and enters the ring. ISAAC sends Valentine off with a SUPERPLEX AND DRAKE CATCHES HIM WITH A NECKBREAKER ON THE WAY DOWN! Cover by Drake Wilcox!

One!

Two!!

THREE!

NOO! ANDROID 69 AT THE LAST MOMENT DIVES IN TO BREAK THE COUNT!

Arthur LaForge: Android 69 with the save at the very last moment! It looks like some fans helped me back to the ringside area after he was… distracted.

Mary DeSue: Right, Artie. Distracted. Don’t you ever get distracted like that around me.

Arthur LaForge: I’ve always been completely professional!

MM was able to get A69 refocused with the push of his remote’s magic buttons and they are supercharged from the fan interactions, dragging Valentine to their corner… Drake Wilcox notices on the mat and grabs Valentine’s legs. A tug-of-war ensues and James Wilcox reaches in and slaps the back of Drake’s head, looking frustrated by the display. He says something to Drake as he gets in and Drake looks none too pleased as James runs and hits a dropkick to the head of A69 to prevent a tag! A69 stumbles into their corner and James turns back to Valentine… SHARPSHOOTER ON VALENTINE!! James screams at Drake and ISAAC to run interference on A69… but they are looking at the big screen, which suddenly comes alive with VICTORIA SALINAS somewhere backstage. James sees this and his grip loosens on the Sharpshooter, confused as to what is happening.

Victoria Salinas: Game changer… those are two words that define much of my career. When I started out and broke the mainstream 12 years ago, I didn’t realize how much of a game changer I was… and then I won my first championship just six matches in. It was a championship that had a tendency to change hands every two to four weeks. I CHANGED that and made that title worth chasing. On the night I won my first world championship, I spun that company on its head and I changed the game by becoming THE standard of the company that I wrestled for at the time. A few years later? I joined a new promotion in November of 2014 and by March of 2015 I was already a world champion and I changed exactly how they did business. Yet, everywhere I go… I get treated like an 8 BIT PLAYER?

I get disrespected because why? I’m not “gamer” enough for you people? But you want to cheer for your Buster Gloves and your Bert MCFUCKFACES of the world, right? You know how sick it made me in my first two matches where I turned around and I saw that overrated, overblown son of a bitch everywhere stealing my damn spotlight as if it SOMEHOW belonged to him and if he SOMEHOW deserved it? Yeah, it REALLY made me sick. I’ve lost count of how many people over the years came in to try and steal what I am entitled to. Larry approached me after my FIRST match, that god forsaken four way where there was WAY more luck than skill involved. I didn’t think much of it. In fact, I really didn’t WANT to listen to his spiel to be honest. But after I had my match with HIS MONSTER and I turned and saw Buster Gloves getting all the spotlight again?

I started to listen a little more. Then when I got that INSULTING battle royal booking, I knew Larry Tact had a point.

James then sees something that enrages him. Larry Tact, the man Drake and ISAAC were seen with at EXP 17, stands on the entrance stage observing. Thanks to the distraction, Valentine had time to crawl to his corner and makes a tag to Coitus Maximus! James turns to ISAAC and Drake… and slaps them both on the chest! He demands they tell him what Larry is doing here. The referee tells ISAAC he must enter the ring because he was ‘tagged’ first. James and Drake go onto the apron while ISAAC sizes up A69, who has their gears and knobs gyrating with energy as the crowd begins to get behind him.

Arthur LaForge: Fans, we had seen Victoria Salinas and Larry Tact attacking Bert McAlroy recently, and in fact ISAAC and Drake were apart of it, too.

Mary DeSue: Apparently James Wilcox didn’t get the memo?

Arthur LaForge: Judging by his reaction, ‘The Wizard’ has taken issue with Larry and Victoria’s sudden appearance. Things could be coming to a head here, but The Faction needs to focus on Android 69 and Valentine, who have been outnumbered all match and continue to hang in there.

Mary DeSue: Weird and weirder? Don’t make me choose which is which. Forget them, can we find out if PEEZEE is okay? I don’t want to lose my edible hookup.

ISAAC goes for a tieup and A69 slips behind him… FIVEPLAY! A69 manages to get a Full Nelson on the bigger man and starts dry-humping! ISAAC is quick to elbow him off, having the size advantage, and only looks more angry from the offensive. James is equally upset, shouting at his Faction teammate. He only becomes more heated as A69 follows up with Robot punches and kicks and a Robot side headlock that ISAAC counters with a back suplex… A69 lands on their feet and hits a Robot clubbing blow to the small of ISAAC’s back and a Robot atomic drop that sends ISAAC to his knees… CRITICAL ANAL-YSIS!! Android 69 hits the SEATED SENTON SPLASH and covers!

One!

Two!!

THR— NO! DRAKE WILCOX BREAKS UP THE PINFALL!

Arthur LaForge: Drake saving this match for the Faction, but you have to think Johnny Hitmaker is impressed with the return on investment tonight. Android 69 is making the most of his second match, at Final Fantasy no less.

Mary DeSue: Please don’t use Android 69 and final fantasy in the same sentence. I don’t even want to imagine what that entails.

A69 begins thrusting in tune to the clapping from the crowd, and spots James demanding for ISAAC to reach him with a tag. A69 stops ISAAC with a Robot leg drop and then mounts him, landing Robot punches as they vibrate over ISAAC. James yells at Drake Wilcox to enter the ring and although Drake isn’t happy with it, he goes in and lands a boot to the head of A69 who goes to the mat. The referee admonishes Drake and tells him not to interfere without being tagged. Drake shrugs and returns to the apron. We can hear James shout that Drake should have done more as ISAAC reaches the corner. He goes to tag James but James walks along the apron, missing ISAAC!

Arthur LaForge: Some tough love being shown by The Wizard.

Mary DeSue: Maybe it was the wrong move. On the bright side, we may get more Drake Wilcox. The bigger, meatier man meat of the Wilcox family!

Arthur LaForge: At least you’re consistent.

Mary DeSue: Where’s the beef? Right there, bitches!

Arthur LaForge: Language!

Drake tags ISAAC and A69 immediately comes at him with a Robot clothesline… Drake doesn’t move! A69 comes in again with a Robot clothesline… Drake tells the smaller android to keep going! A69 tries for a third time and Drake cuts them off with a Big Boot, flattening A69. Drake direct his anger at MM’s creation, lifting him off the mat and biel throwing him across the ring. Fortunately, Valentine is able to make a tag… but Drake crushes him with a corner splash as soon as he enters! He clubs Valentine over the back and lands a TWO HANDED CHOKESLAM!! As he is about to make the cover, Drake and The Faction pause looking towards the arena stage, where Larry has begun walking down to the ring… and shows he is holding THE WAND!

Mary DeSue: That ain’t going to make The Faction happy.

Arthur LaForge: Larry has The Wand! James Wilcox has made that a symbol of The Faction, and he looks like he’s about to lose it.

Mary DeSue: Someone tell James that possession is nine-tenths of the law. Larry Troll checking the box tonight.

Arthur LaForge: He had better be careful. He's one-half of tonight's Main Event and is risking his health by messing with The Faction.

Larry makes his way down to the ring, examining the inscriptions on The Wand as James screams at ISAAC to go recover The Wand. Drake lost track of Valentine, who managed to make a tag to Android 69. ISAAC approaches Larry and the referee is telling Tact to not get involved in the match. Behind the ref’s back, VICTORIA SALINAS comes from the crowd and pulls James Wilcox off the apron… SHE DRILLS HIM WITH A BUSAIKU KNEE! Drake turns to see James down and gets hit with a Robot kitchen sink from A69 followed by a Robot clothesline! Drake is sent into a corner and A69 raises their arms, as if ‘powering up’ with great vibrations… super Robot clothesline! They then back up… LAUNCH TIME! NO! ISAAC GETS IN THE RING AND CATCHES A69 MIDAIR WITH THE HEADHUNTER OUT OF NOWHERE!! Before the referee can say anything, Drake Wilcox falls on A69 with a cover!

One!

Two!!

THREE!!!

Mr. Rad: Your winners of this match… THE FAAAACCCTIIIIOOOON!!!

Larry promptly gets a microphone at ringside while ISAAC and Drake go outside the ring and help James Wilcox up.

Larry looks around at the crowd, then shrugs and hands the mic to Victoria, who looks around with disdain.

Victoria Salinas: You don’t get to treat me like an 8 bit player anymore. This company isn’t the stupid little MARIO FANTASY LAND that the powers that be wanted it to be. You idiots in the audience that are hoping that I am going through a phase and that I’m going to revert back to my old ways? FUCK that and FUCK YOU! That fucking PUSHOVER that sat back and ate it while everyone else surpassed her doesn’t exist anymore! To all of the IDIOTS that “believed in me” and thought I was ALWAYS going to fight for the “right cause”? Your princess is in another castle now bitches… and the kingdom we’re going to create here doesn’t have mushrooms!

Victoria scoffs after finishing up what she has to say, the crowd jeering her. Larry has gotten a second microphone for himself, as has James Wilcox.

‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox: Enough of these games. What do you think you’re doing, Larry? You tread on thin ice in these final days, living in a fantasy you never had control over. You do not know the power with which you hold, and it will destroy you should you attempt to control it. In absentia lucis, Tenebrae vincunt. Give me The Wand, lest you risk succumbing to the darkness at the hands of The Faction!

Larry Tact: Funny you should say that, James. See, I can tell ‘The Wizard’ still has plenty of fire inside. Tonight, everyone saw The Faction lay waste to PEEZEE and I bet you three could really do some damage to myself and Victoria.

‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox: I’m glad you see our way. The Wand, give it to me. Now.

Larry looks at The Wand, then at James. He shakes his head.

Larry Tact: I happen to find this a trophy. A tactful symbol of our joining forces.

‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox: I don’t know what you mean, Larry. All you’ve done is seal your fate.

James signals for Drake Wilcox and ISAAC to go forward and attack! Drake and ISAAC move ahead towards Larry and Victoria, and Tact nods… DRAKE AND ISAAC TURN AND ATTACK JAMES WILCOX! They club him with blows and send him into the side of the ring with a crash. Drake gets a table and tosses it over the ropes before heading into the ring.

Arthur LaForge: BETRAYAL!! I can’t believe what we’re seeing!

Mary DeSue: Larry Tact pulling the ultimate trolling on James Wilcox!

Arthur LaForge: He somehow has gotten James’ own brother and his converted muscle to turn on The Wizard! After all their time as a group in Level Up, this is stunning.

Victoria enters the ring with ISAAC and when ‘The Wizard’ gets up, she hits him with another BUSAIKU KNEE that sends him onto the set up table. Drake and ISAAC then hold James down as Larry ascends the to the top rope. He slowly rises and holds The Wand out in front of him, making a sign of the cross with it… DIVE TO BLUE WITH THE WAND!! HE DRIVES THE SLEDGEHAMMER RIGHT INTO THE HEART OF JAMES WILCOX THROUGH THE TABLE!!

Arthur LaForge: Devastating! The Faction have splintered and James Wilcox has been put through a table by Larry Tact.

Mary DeSue: What a burn of James, I almost feel bad for the guy. But I don’t really know him or care.

As Larry holds up Victoria’s hand and The Wand, Drake Wilcox and ISAAC leave the ring for a moment and return with GASOLINE! They pour it over James Wilcox’s prone form before Larry turns and looks wide-eyed. He gets between them, giving them an earful… before dropping the ruse, smirking and looking down at The Wizard. He drops The Wand down on James Wilcox’s chest before Drake and ISAAC finish dousing The Wizard. They then pull out matches…

Mary DeSue: I was wrong… the real burn is coming!

Arthur LaForge: Mary, this is sick! These supposed Game Changers are out to take a man’s life! James Wilcox has done some despicable acts, but this is way over the line. Larry Tact is going to have plenty to answer for. Oh thank goodness, here comes security!

Officials and security come out, but Drake already lit the match… then without warning, dark smoke billows from the ring mat! The mat goes out and along with it the lights. A purple spotlight envelopes the form of James Wilcox and the smoke covers the entire ring in darkness. It looks like James is being lifted up by the smoke! He elevates further and further, into the rafters and out of sight. The big screen then illuminates the darkness and we simply see the words:

IN ABSENTIA LUCIS, TENEBRAE VINCUNT.

The words disappear and house lights come back on. Once the smoke dissipates, we find ‘The Wizard’ James Wilcox is indeed gone. Larry picks up The Wand from the table ruins, and holds it up to the crowd with a triumphant roar as Victoria Salinas gets on the ropes with a fist raised, and what’s left of The Faction ascend opposite turnbuckles. The Game Changers are heavily booed by the crowd as they pose together.


---

Lord Raab vs. Joey Crash vs. Kat Jones vs. Emily Simms

The boss battle theme music Final Fantasy 8 fills the arena. There's a spotlight in the middle of the stage as Joey Crash slowly rises through the floor. Crash is dressed in black combat boots, with a long gray coat over a blue shirt with white trim. As he rises to the stage into the spotlight, it's clear he's dressed as Seifer from Final Fantasy 8. He raises a gunblade in his left hand and poses triumphantly as he fully enters the glow.

The battle music fades away, and the maniacal laughter signaling the beginning of Joey Crash's music starts with a jump.

"Are you done digging your grave yet?"

Crash strides powerfully toward the ring, making practiced, dramatic slashing motions with the gunblade. Approaching the apron, he carelessly drops the weapon down and throws the coat off, ripping the shirt and tearing it clean off his body.

"YOU'RE DEAD, ALREADY! DEAD DEAD, ALREADY READY DEAD!"

Crash looks out to the crowd with a grimace before entering the ring. He runs the ropes and shoves the referee out of the corner, throwing heavy shots into the turnbuckle. Finally he climbs the turnbuckle with one foot perched on the top rope, shouting how this is his time, and shouting his moniker, "The man who beat the man, who beat the Power Champion". After this short frenzy he drops back to the ring and starts pacing back and forth in his corner.

Mr Rad: This is a fatal four-way match, with the winner earning the right to enter The Last of Us gauntlet match LAST. Introducing first…from London, England, weighing in at 225 pounds…JOEYYYY CRASH!

Arthur La Forge: Joey Crash has been impressive in his Level Up run so far, and has been demanding an opportunity. Entering last in the Last of Us in March would be one hell of an opportunity.

Mary DeSue: Yeah, that thing is an endurance run. He’d have his pick of all the other tired wrestlers to eliminate and maybe win!
Monster by Skillet plays over the sound system as Lord Raab comes out through the curtain wearing his red and black wrestling trousers with his nickname The Masked German Monster on the front of them with Monster Energy logos on the side of his trousers with black gloves on both of his hands and wears a black and red stripy mask and ignores the fans as he goes up the stairs before going in-between the ropes and crouches down in the corner moving backwards and forwards, rubbing his hands and moving his neck around while looking at Crash with anger in his eyes.

Mr Rad: Next up, from Cologne Germany, weighing in at 260 pounds…the Masked German Monster, LORDDD RAAABBB!

Arthur La Forge: And then there’s Lord Raab, who injured his last two opponents out of spite.

Mary DeSue: And three potential victims right here. Guy’s scary.

"Release me"

The two words from the Public Address system in the arena cause the fans in attendance, already on their feet, to react with disdain and unappreciative shouts. Kat Jones, badass Cincinnati native of ill repute methodically makes her way to the top of the ramp from the gorilla position. Her black shorts and knee high boots are more characterizing of her facial expression and attitude toward the scathing crowd, than her highly decorative top full of self expression.

"No remnants were ever found of it
Feeling the hot bile
With every fake smile
Though no evidence was ever found
It never went away completely"

Kat walks toward the ring, methodically and without much concern at all, regarding the insults and jeers thrown in her direction.

Mr Rad: Making her way to the ring, hailing from Cincinnati, Ohio, weighing in at one hundred twenty four pounds, she is the "WildKat"... KAT JOONNEESS!!!”

Arthur La Forge: Kat Jones is currently undefeated in Level Up and if she can keep that up, she’ll have the best chance at The Last of Us in March.

Mary DeSue: She did beat Cara Strader at the last show! She’s got a great shot!

"I try to hide from the unholy sound of it

Another day gone
Another night's dawn"


Standing before the ring apron, Kat removes her black leather jacket, whips it behind her, releasing it and allowing it to sail toward the ramp, ultimately letting out a bloodcurdling scream, before she enters the ring.[/b][/b][/i]

Smile by Katy Perry kicks up over the speakers and a series of blue and purple pyro goes off as pictures of Emily appear across the screen behind her as she appears and begins to skip her way to the ring, slapping hands with fans along the way. She stops at the bottom of the ramp and looks to her right and then to her left before jumping up onto the ring apron and doing the splits and pulling herself under the bottom rope. Running to a corner, Emily jumps to the second turnbuckle and waves to the crowd before blowing them a kiss.

Mr Rad: And lastly, from San Diego, California, weighing in at 120 pounds…EMILLYYYY SIMMMSS!

Arthur La Forge: Emily Simms made her debut at EXP 19, teaming with Duncan Shepard. This will be our first chance to see her on her own.

Mary DeSue: Yeah, no Power Champion watching her back! She’s getting thrown to the wolves!

All four competitors are raring to go, and Kirby calls for the bell! Crash starts brawling with Raab, while Kat flings herself at Simms! Simms manages to dodge out of the way, but Kat flips off the ropes and knocks her down with a handspring elbow! Meanwhile, Crash is manhandled by Raab, who tosses him into the corner and drives his shoulder into his gut repeatedly! Simms manages to get the upper hand over Kat, ducking a clothesline and connecting with a pele kick! The kick knocks Kat into the corner, and Simms whips her to the opposite side of the ring. Raab notices this at the last second and moves out of the way, causing Kat to collide with Crash in the corner. Simms charges, ducking a clothesline from Raab and nailing a corner splash on Crash and Kat!

Arthur La Forge: Simms taking advantage of her surroundings and more importantly, avoiding the monster!

Mary DeSue: Well yeah, she saw what he did to Luiz and Dominique.

Simms doesn’t have a chance to follow up, as Raab is onto her, spearing her into the corner! Simms collides with Kat and Crash who are still pinned in the turnbuckle. Raab starts dishing out the pain, resuming his shoulder charges but this time nailing all three of his opponents! The Masked German Monster grabs Simms and tosses her out of the ring, then he wraps his arms around Crash and slings him out of the corner with a belly to belly! This leaves Kat in the corner, and Raab hoists her up to the top rope. She struggles to escape, driving elbows into Raab’s skull, but this seems to only enrange him further! Raab sizzles her chest with a nasty open-palm chop, then ascends to the top rope with her. He hooks her arm, looking for a SUPERPLEX…NO! Kat counters, holding her ground on the top rope. She punches Raab in the gut, chops his chest…and nails a nasty BITCHSLAP! Raab is still on the top rope, but she finally manages to kick him off. Before Kat can follow up, Simms sails over her head, connecting with a SWANTON BOMB!

Arthur La Forge: Beautiful aerial attack from Simms!

Mary DeSue: Man, Duncan Shepard is gonna kick your ass for simping that way.

Arthur La Forge: I’m pretty sure he’d agree!

Before Simms can cover Raab, she is grabbed from behind by Crash, who sends her sailing out of the ring again. He turns around to steal the pin, but is met by Kat! She leaps off the top rope and connects with a tornado DDT! The move drills Crash’s head into the mat, and gives Kat an opportunity to go and cover Raab.

ONE!

Raab throws Kat off of him.

Arthur La Forge: Just when you think you might have an opportunity to beat Raab, he proves just how resilient he is.

Mary DeSue: They should have all pinned him at once. Split the final three spots. Might have been their only shot.

The big man sits up, glaring at Kat. Kat refuses to show any fear, bouncing off the ropes and nailing Raab with a dropkick while he’s in the seated position! The monster refuses to stay down, but Kat is already scouting this, she bounces off the ropes and looks for a spinning heel kick…but he catches her! Raab lifts her onto his shoulder, looking for a powerslam…but he’s met with a SPINNING BACKFIST by Crash! Kat wriggles free of Raab as Crash unloads on him with boxing strikes to the head and gut. Raab manages to block one and headbutts Crash, sending him sprawling…but as Raab turns around he’s met with a superkick by Kat! This finally knocks the German monster down, and Simms is back on the top rope! She leaps off and connects with a beautiful MOONSAULT! Cover!

ONE!

TWO!

Broken up by Kat!

Arthur La Forge: They got Raab down, but they couldn’t keep him down!

Mary DeSue: Yeah, because Kat got greedy! My plan would have worked!

Arthur La Forge: Sure it would…and a gun blade was a good idea.

Unfortunately for Simms, Kat isn’t about to let her steal the win, breaking up the pin with an axe handle. Kat lays into Simms with rights and lefts, then pulls her up, looking to throw her out of the ring AGAIN (?!) But this time Simms reverses it, sending Kat over the top rope instead. Crash is up, and Simms charges at him, taking him down with a headscissors! She lifts him up and hoists Crash into a fireman’s carry! She’s looking for a GO TO SLEEP…BUT CRASH RAKES THE EYES! The dirty move causes Simms to lose her grip on Crash and he slides off her back. Kick to the gut, THUNDER CRASH!! Crash follows up the fisherman’s brainbuster with a cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO!!

Raab breaks it up!

Arthur La Forge: That monster will not stay down!

Mary DeSue: He’ll kill them all if he has to!

The Lord is immediately spun around by Kat, kick, WHAM, FREAKED OUT! Kat plants him with a snap DDT, but barely has time to capitalise as Crash is on her! He grabs her by the hair and drags her away from Raab, then throws her across the ring. Kat rolls to her feet, clutching her skull in pain. She looks to retaliate with a clothesline, but Crash ducks it and rolls her up! CRASH HAS THE TIGHTS AS KIRBY BEGINS THE COUNT!!

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO!!

Broken up by Simms, who runs from behind and nails Crash with a shining wizard!

Arthur La Forge: Ouch, what a painful shot from Simms! Can you imagine what would it mean for her to win such a big match her second time out in Level Up?

Mary DeSue: Oh my god, just go ask her to open an Onlyfans and shut up.

Arthur La Forge: Um…what?

Pulling Crash over by his legs, Simms steps through, looking to lock in a figure-four! She tussles with him for a moment…BUT SHE’S GOT IT!! Crash thrashes about, trying to prevent Simms from transitioning the hold into a London Bridge. Suddenly hope appears for Crash as Raab is back up, but he’s stopped by Kat! Takes the man’s legs out from under him, then looks to lock in WILDKAT!! Kat manages to get Raab’s legs locked in, but is struggling to lift him up…BUT NOW SHE HAS! With a rush of adrenaline, Kat lifts up the 260 pounder and cinches in the PTO! At the same time, Simms, manages to fully transition into the figure-eight, LONDON BRIDGE!! Both men are in a tough spot, in equally painful submissions.

Arthur La Forge: Will the monster tap out? Or will Crash?

Mary DeSue: It’s a race to cause more pain! Just like when I worked with Lenny that one time!

Crash is thrashing about, his legs twisted and contorted by the pressure applied by the athletic Simms. His hand hover above the mat…it looks like he might…NO! He tries to tap out, but Raab stops him by grabbing his hand! Kat was unable to keep the big man completely in the PTO, and so he was able to wiggle free, though she still has his legs wrapped up. Crash’s eyes grow wide and he screams at the German monster, who just stares at him coldly. Crash pleads with him, but Raab isn’t having any of it. Kat, realizing she is unlikely to get Raab to tap out, breaks the hold, and prevents Simms from getting the win by breaking up her submission with an elbow drop.

Arthur La Forge: Looks like Kat had more faith in Simms’ submission than her own!

Mary DeSue: Wow, twisting facts to suit your simp agenda! Obviously she realized she wasn’t gonna get big dumb Raab to tap out! Who could?

Kat and Simms are the first competitors to their feet. Simms, furious at Kat stealing her chance to win the match, charges at her! Simms connects with a clothesline which sends both women over the top rope and to the outside. As Simms wails on Kat on the outside, Crash and Raab begin to stir inside the ring. Raab is first up, and trudges over to Crash. He grabs him by the neck, and lifts him to his feet! Raab hooks the arm, CHOKEINATOR!! NO! NUTSHOT! Crash kicks Raab in the groin, then rolls him up - FEET ON THE ROPES!!

ONE!

TWO!

Simms notices the pin and rushes in to break it..

THREE!!

But she’s too late!

DING DING DING!!

Mr Rad: Here is your winner…and FINAL entrant into The Last of Us Match, JOEYYY CRASHHH!!

Arthur La Forge: Joey Crash steals one!

Mary DeSue: Steal, yeah right! Would you want Raab in there any more? He was the only one willing to do what needed to be done!

Joey slides out of the ring and starts running away, taking his win and heading for the hills! Simms is staring at him in disbelief, while Raab is slowly beginning to recover from the ball assault. Kat is still down on the outside from Simms’ attack. Joey celebrates on the stage, having stolen the very valuable final spot in TLoU!

Arthur La Forge: Well either way, Crash will now enter the Last of Us match last, giving him the biggest advantage on the roster.

Mary DeSue: He’s about to TAKE that opportunity he wants!

---


The fast guitar riff for “Reborn Through Failure” hits the speakers and once the vocals kick in Chelsea makes her way out onto the entrance ramp ready for battle.

Mr. Rad: This match is set for one fall! Introducing first, from Chicago. Illinois, she is the “Nightmare Angel” Chelsea Skye!”

Following her ring introduction Chelsea makes her way down to the ring slapping hands with the occasional fan along the way, she enters the ring and runs the ropes as she waits for her opponent.


Arthur La Forge: This match was made after Salinas eliminated Skye in the battle royal a couple of shows back.

Mary DeSue: Yeah, Chelsea got in Salinas’ way and paid for it!


Arthur La Forge: Well she gets a chance at payback here tonight.

Mary DeSue: Payback for what? Being great? Salinas is a future champion, and Skye isn’t!


The arena speakers play the chorus of "Who Gon Stop Me" and the crowd has a loud, negative reaction when Victoria Salinas appears on the stage. Victoria completely ignores the audience as she starts to make her way to the ring.

Mr. Rad: And her opponent, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, weighing in at 132 pounds…VICTORIA SALINAS!

Arriving at ringside, she pauses for a split second and collects herself to soak in all the hatred she's getting. She leans against the corner, still ignoring the fans and largely soaking in their hatred, while she waits for the match to start.

Arthur La Forge: If Skye is able to beat Salinas tonight, I wonder if that means Salinas’ future title opportunity would be forfeit?

Mary DeSue: It’s not on the line, so why would it?

Arthur La Forge: Because Skye got the win?

Mary DeSue: She should have got the win in the multiplayer battle royal, instead of blaming Victoria for her failures!

The match begins with Victoria mouthing off to Skye, jawing over her neglect of this match in her Twitter feed.Skye however doesn’t take it for long as she lays into Victoria with stiff elbow and forearm shots to the face. She drives Victoria to the ropes, Victoria leans out over them as Chelsea keeps attacking. Ref Kirby pulls Chelsea off at four, warning her that if he gets to five he will disqualify her. However, Victoria takes this time to leap upon the ropes and spring off with a big dropkick that almost gets Kirby as well!

Arthur La Forge: Kirby learning the hard way not to get in the middle of the match!

Mary DeSue: Tough day to be a zebra.

Victoria ignores the understandably pissed off Kirby and mounts Chelsea, raining down stiff right hands as the other competitor does her best to cover up from the barrage. Victoria gets to her feet and continues the assault, stomping away on Chelsea. She stalks her, screaming at her to get up before dropping her back down with a running knee to the face! The impact resonates through the arena and earns an ‘Ooooh’ from the audience. Salinas smirks and drops down for a pin.

ONE!

TW-

Arthur La Forge: A sick shot from Salinas, who is taking a little too much pleasure in hurting her opponent.

Mary DeSue: Look, Salinas feels disrespected. She worked hard to get where she is!

Arthur La Forge: And Skye hasn’t?

Chelsea kicks out and Salinas instantly turns to reprimand Kirby for not doing a good job. She gets to her feet, and runs to the ropes, she leaps upon them and goes for a springboard moonsault! NO! CHELSEA GETS HER KNEES UP!! Salinas bounces off her knees and scrambles to the ropes to pull herself up. Skye is upon her with a clothesline that takes the both out over the top rope and crashing to the floor.

Arthur La Forge: This thing is getting wild!

Mary DeSue: As long as they don’t come over here. Well I mean, Victoria can. She’s cool.

On the outside, Chelsea Is up first and nails Victoria with a superkick! Salinas stumbles away, catching herself on the ring steps only for Chelsea to charge in and nail her with a bulldog on them! Now Victoria is sprawled out on the floor and Skye looks between her and the ring thoughtfully before a devilish grin crosses her face. She leaps upon the apron and begins scaling to the top rope.

Arthur La Forge: Skye is going to take to the skies!

Mary DeSue: Ugh. Ten points from Gryffindor for that pun.

Arthur La Forge: You read Harry Potter?

Mary DeSue: There are books too?

She balances on the top rope, eyeing Salinas and lining up. She raises her hands and leaps, going for SKYES THE LIMIT…SALINAS MOVES! SKYE GETS NOTHING BUT FLOOR AND LANDS WITH A SICKENING THUD ON HER BACK!! Salinas grins from where she;s leaning on the guardrail. Ref Kirby bumbles out of the ring and goes to check on Skye who lays still as stone. Just as he’s signaling for the ring doctor, Salinas comes over and snatches Skye by her hair!

Arthur La Forge: Illegal hair pull by Salinas!

Mary DeSue: She’s just showing her a new style! Stop overreacting!

She lifts Skye up and body slams her over the guardrail which elicits a cry of agony from Chelsea. As she crumples to the floor, Victoria jaws at the fans mocking them. She snatches Skye by her hair and drags her to the ring, rolling her in. She climbs on the apron slowly, patiently. She’s in no rush. Skye is hurt, and barely moving. Still, the Nightmare Angel shows grit as she gets to her feet. Victoria leaps onto the top rope, and nails her with a springboard clothesline! She goes for another pin!


ONE!

TWO!

TH–NO!! CHELSEA KICKS OUT!!

Arthur La Forge: Skye get bent in half on that clothesline and still got the shoulder up!

Mary DeSue: That’s just disrespectful. She should show respect and STAY DOWN. It’s insulting that she’s trying!

Salinas is incensed as she gets up and backs Kirby into a corner screaming at him to do his fucking job. As she’s harassing the official, she fails to see Chelsea get her second wind! She kips to her feet and charges in, nailing Victoria with a back stabber! Victoria writhes in pain and scrambles to her feet, only to eat a superkick that sends her into the ropes. Chelsea stays on her, laying in right hands and whipping Victoria into the corner with so much force she bounces off them and collapses to the floor!

Arthur La Forge: Skye is furious right now, or at least it certainly seems that way.

Mary DeSue: I would be too if I didn’t know how to beat my opponent!

Arthur La Forge: We’ll see about that!

Chelsea goes and yanks Victoria up by her hair she then takes her over with a snap suiplex, rolls her hips and pulls them both up. She lifts Victoria up and this time drops her with a brainbuster but she isn’t done! She lifts her up and this time nails her with a high impact fisherman suplex! She hooks the leg as Kirby slides in to count!

ONE!

TWO!

T–NO! SALINAS KICKS OUT!!

Arthur La Forge: Salinas just barely kicks out, and Skye is shocked!

Mary DeSue: I’m not. Makes perfect sense to me!

Chelsea looks surprised but keeps her head on right, confirming with Kirby it was a two she stands and backs to a corner, kneeling down and waiting. She waves her arm, motioning for Salinas to get up. Eventually she does, wobbly and looking like she’s unsure where she is. Chelsea charges in for a spear…BUT SALINAS PULLS KIRBY IN THE WAY! REF KIRBY IS NEARLY CUT IN HALF FROM THE SPEAR!! Chelsea looks mortified as she goes to check on Kirby.

Arthur La Forge: Oh no! Poor Kirby got laid out!

Mary DeSue: That’s what he gets! We all know referees should stay out of the way!

Arthur La Forge: I’m astonished by your lack of sympathy.

Salinas however takes full advantage of the situation and motions to the crowd. She then turns and grabs Skye by her hair, lifting her up and nailing a thunderous backdrop driver that spikes her head into the mat! At the same time, Larry Tact hops the guardrail and slides into the ring with a pair of brass knucks on and another in hand,. He hands the second pair to Salinas and the two mock Skye, waiting for her to get up! As she does, she’s extremely wobbly and favoring the back of her head…

Arthur La Forge: Damn it! Tact is going to help her steal one!

Mary DeSue: Finally, justice!

She turns and BAM she eats two right hands at once, to either side of her head from Tact and Salinas! Tact rolls out of the ring after taking the knucks from Salinas and disappears into the crowd with a smug smirk on his face. Another Ref finally makes a beeline for the ring, apparently missing everything because refs miss everything. As they slide in, Salinas has lifted Skye up and with a smug smirk nails her with the VANITY BREAKER!

Arthur La Forge: Well it’s easy to say it’s over now. This is ridiculous.

Mary DeSue: Skye should minded her business! She tried to get in Victora’s way and paid for it!

Salinas stands over the downed Skye and rests a boot on her chest.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!

Arthur La Forge: If someone doesn’t stand up to Tact and his team soon, Level Up might not be as fun as it used to be.

Mary De Sue: Says you! I’m having a blast!

---


The Gong-intro of “Hells Bells” by AC/DC hits the PA-system and on every gong-hit a section of the arena goes dark until eventually only a single spotlight on the entranceway remains. As the riff of the song starts playing, through the curtain steps Donny Mason who stops at the spotlight to take in the atmosphere. He drops to one knee and spreads his arms to his sides in a pose very reminiscent of his father. Then the lights go out completely and “Hells Bells” gets replaced by the fast-paced intro of “Ace of Spades” By Motörhead, the lights coming back full force as the main riff of the song blasts out of the PA system and we see “Old School Cool” Don Tirri standing behind Donny with his hands on the younger mans shoulders. Donny stands up and the two high five each other before starting to make their way down the ramp, Donny slapping hands with the fans on the rampway and Tirri doing his trademark strut.
Mr. Rad: Introducing first, the challengers…making their way to the ring at a combined weight of 550 pounds… Don Tirri, Donny Mason, TEEEEEAM…. THIIIIIICCCNESSSSS!

Arthur La Forge: Don Tirri has one dream in wrestling and that’s to be a champion with his son.

Mary DeSue: His dream is my dream too! It’s been a damn year! WE NEED A THICC CHAMPION!
The pair reach the ring and enter it quickly, Tirri rolling under the bottom rope and Donny stepping over the top one. Tirri walks over to the corner and climbs the top turnbuckle, posing to the crowd while Donny does the same on the opposite corner. Finally the two return to the middle of the ring and with a fist bump start strategizing and deciding which one of them starts as the music fades away.

Arthur La Forge: Well we might get one, because I can’t think of a team with a better bond than father and son…

Mary DeSue: Me either!

As "True Survivor" blares forth, Bert McAlroy comes charging out dressed in jeans and a hoodie! He bounces from one foot to the other, arms raised in the air. He drops down and Ahmya leaps over him, landing on her feet in an impressive display of acrobatics! The Multiplayer Champions make their way down to the ring, slapping outstretched hands with their Gauntlets.

Mr Rad: And their opponents, weighing in at a total of 264 pounds…they are the reigning, defending Multiplayer Champions…the team of Bert McAlroy and Ahmya, BEAUTYYY AND THE BONG!

Arthur La Forge: …except maybe husband and wife! The champions have arrived!

Mary DeSue: I hope this is a bad week for Bert. Lose these titles, then Maggie stomps his shit.

The champs roll in under the bottom rope, and as Bert poorly shadow boxes in front of Donny and Tirri, Ahmya leaps onto the ropes and taunts to the crowd.


Arthur La Forge: Both Bert and Ahmya looking to be double champions after this weekend. Truly history-making stuff if they can.


Mary DeSue: But they gotta get past my thicc bois first!

The match kicks off with two men who are no stranger to one another - Bert and Tirri. The two jostle for superiority before Tirri takes control with a knee to McAlroy’s gut. He pulls the stoner over to the corner and bounces his head off the top turnbuckle. Tirri lights up Bert’s chest with a chop and Donny hollers in appreciation. He looks to land a second, but Bert ducks it, and swaps positions with Tirri! Bert unloads with a barrage of rights and lefts before whipping the Don into the opposite corner. Tirri lands with such force that he staggers out of the corner and is met with a dropkick! Bert follows up by whipping Tirri off the ropes, but he reverses it! Bert is instead sent into the ropes, where he’s quietly met with a knee to the back by Donny! The ref is blind to this, and Bert staggers forward where he is powerslammed by Tirri! Cover!

ONE!

TWO!

Bert kicks out.

Arthur La Forge: If there’s one thing that’s apparent right away, it’s that the Tirris are bigger and stronger than the champions.

Mary DeSue: And sexier!

Arthur La Forge: And you called ME a simp earlier?

Tirri manhandles Bert, tossing him into his corner and driving his shoulder into his gut repeatedly. He makes the tag to his son, and Donny Mason enters the ring. The two team up on Bert, whipping him into the ropes and planting him with a nasty looking DOUBLE SPINEBUSTER! The thicc men look pretty pleased with themselves, and they celebrate by leaping into the air and doing a chest-five that causes the ring to shake from the sheer amount of meat that’s leaving and returning to the mat.

Arthur La Forge: Breathe, Mary.

Mary DeSue: I think I have a nosebleed!

Arthur La Forge: Gross!

Tirri leaves the ring and Donny resumes the punishment, unloading a series of knee strikes into the back of Bert. Bert attempts to crawl to his corner but Donny catches him by the foot! Hopping on one foot, Bert stands and twists around to lock eyes with Donny. The big man is licking his lips, but not for long, McAlroy connects with an enziguri! Bert hits the deck but the kick only rocks Donny, who stays on his feet. Bert again looks to make it to Ahmya but he’s thwarted AGAIN! Mason grabs him around the waist and drags him back to the center of the ring. Donny has locked in a bearhug, squeezing the life out of the Bong Master! Donny’s expression is straight up nightmare fuel as he grunts in satisfaction. Bert struggles but can’t free himself from Donny’s clutches, looking like he might…NO! Bert ducks as at the last second Ahmya flies through the air and takes down Mason with a flying forearm!

Arthur La Forge: Bert and Ahmya are one gelled team, and they even fight alike now!

Mary DeSue: It’s gross. Even grosser than Bert in general. Edible-stealing thief!

Arthur La Forge: That was MONTHS ago!

Mary DeSue: So you admit it!

Donny rises and roars at Ahmya, looking to demolish her with a clothesline - but she ducks! Ahmya leaps up and wraps her legs around Donny’s head from behind, then plants him with a reverse hurricanrana! She barely has a moment to plan her next move when Tirri spears her right through the ropes, sending them both to the outside! This leaves the two legal men, Bert and Donny, still in the ring. The two look at the carnage on the outside, then at each other. McAlroy looks for the surprise attack, going for a BONG WATER…NO! Mason side-steps the superkick, then lifts Bert into a military press! He then steps forward and launches him over the ropes and onto Tirri and Ahmya!

Arthur La Forge: Donny was so eager to throw Bert out of the ring, he threw him onto his own father!

Mary DeSue: Tirri gonna need to take an extra shower tonight now! He’s got Bert stank on him!

The three wrestlers crash in a heap, with Donny seeming to chuckle at the fact that he took out his own Dad. But, apparently hitting two birds with one stone isn’t enough for Donny, and he takes to the top turnbuckle. Showing impressive agility for a big man, Donny walks across the top rope, then springs off to take out all three with a MOONSAULT - CRASHING DOWN!

Arthur La Forge: OH MY GOD! FLYING TIRRI!

Mary DeSue: IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL.

It’s utter devastation on the outside, with bodies strewn everywhere all in the name of the Multiplayer Gauntlets! Donny is the first to stir, and rolls Bert back into the ring. He makes the cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO! Bert kicks out.

Arthur La Forge: I’m shocked that Bert got out of that! Maybe one of the other two got the worst of the moonsault?

Mary DeSue: Hit Bert with another one!

Mason pounds the mat in frustration. He holds three fingers up to Ref Crash who shakes his head and gestures a two count. Donny lifts up McAlroy, and hooks his arm. He lifts Bert up for a stalling suplex, holding him up in the air upside-down. Suddenly Bert comes to life and begins wriggling, trying to get free. Donny begins to lose his grip and stumbles backwards. This allows Ahmya to reach out and pull on Bert’s leg, giving him the weight boost he needed to reverse the suplex! Bert touches down and then, with impressive strength, suplexes the man mountain that is Donny Mason! Tirri looks on in disbelief from his corner as McAlroy FINALLY makes the tag to Ahmya!

Arthur La Forge: HERE COMES AHMYA!

Mary DeSue:: Shut her down Team Thiccness! We almost got this!

Ahmya is a house of fire when she makes her entrance, leaping from the top rope to take Donny down with a flying hurricanrana! With fire in her eyes, Ahmya screams for Donny to get up. He takes a swing at her as he does, but she blocks it, twists his arm and somersaults over. Pulling both of Donny’s arms behind him, Ahmya connects with a STRAIGHTJACKET BACKSTABBER! Ahmya bounces back to her feet to see Tirri charging at her, but she pulls the top rope down and sends him flying to the outside! Feeding off the energy from the crowd, Ahmya clambers up the turnbuckle. She steadies herself on the top rope, then leaps off…HAIL’S BLESSING! Ahmya connects with a 360 foot stomp, smashing her feet into Donny’s head. She hooks the leg!

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO! Broken up!

Arthur La Forge: Donny Mason surprises everyone by getting out of that!

Mary DeSue: Not me! He’s got a thicc head!

Arthur La Forge: You do realize you just insulted him, right?

Mary DeSue: WHAT? NO I DIDN’T!

Before the ref can count three, Ahmya is pulled out of the ring by Tirri! He bounces her head off the apron, then whips her into the crowd barrier. Roaring in primal anger, Tirri charges forward and hits THE BOOT! His patented running big boot sends Ahmya over the barrier and into the crowd! Satisfied, Tirri turns back to the ring, only to see Bert on the apron, looking absolutely incensed. Tirri merely smirks at him, as if obliging him to “do your worst”. But before Bert can do anything, he’s hit from behind by Donny! The shoulder charge from behind sends McAlroy flying into the waiting arms of Tirri, who plants him with SACK OF SHIT! The fallaway slam flattens Bert on the unprotected outside!

Arthur La Forge: I think Bert’s out of this match! He might be out of tomorrow’s too after that!

Mary DeSue: Oh I hope so! Give Tirri the shot instead! Either one!

Unfortunately Bert is not the legal man, so Team Thiccness has to dig Ahmya out from the crowd. Tirri waltzes over to the crowd barrier, taking all the time in the world. He reaches down to grab Ahmya by the hair, but she counters and bounces Tirri’s head off the barrier! She then backs up and leaps over the barrier, wrapping Tirri up in a tilt-a-whirl headscissors! She sends him flying into the steels steps shoulder-first. Ref Crash, who has been deliberately lax on the outside 10-count, finally tries to get things under control. He calls for Ahmya to return to the ring, where he is trying to restrain Donny from rushing to the outside. Ahmya slowly makes it back to the apron, where she glances over at Bert. He’s back in their corner, but has taken a lot of punishment throughout the match. McAlroy slowly extends his hand. She takes it, but not to make a tag. She gives it a squeeze, then enters the ring to face Donny.

Arthur La Forge: Ahmya cares for Bert, but now she’s ready to handle business.

Mary DeSue: More like get handled! Mess her up, Donny!

Mason can barely contain himself when Ref Crash finally lets him go. But, Ahmya had this scouted, and she hits a low dropkick to his knee. Donny greets the canvas head first, and like a spider, Ahmya is on him…looking for OYASUMINASAI! NO! She can’t quite get it locked in, Donny is so huge that it’s difficult for her to cinch the submission in completely. Using his strength, Donny stands up and sends Ahmya up and over…BUT SHE ROLLS HIM UP!

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO!! Donny kicks out!

Arthur La Forge: Ahmya nearly got one up on the challenger! But it’s not over yet!

Mary DeSue: Oh god, that was too close. AVOID ROLL-UPS!

Donny rolls to his feet, but this time he outthinks Ahmya. He pump fakes a sudden move, and Ahmya goes down, only for Donny to meet her there with an elbow drop! Donny pulls Ahmya up by the hair and barks at her that “IT’S ALL OVER NOW!”. He tosses her into the ropes and connects with a DAMBUSTER BOOT!! The claymore kick looks like it nearly knocks Ahmya unconscious. Bert tries to get in to prevent a pin, but Donny serves up another DAMBUSTER BOOT!! Donny pins Ahmya.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!

DING DING DING!!

Mr Rad: Here are your winners…AND NEWWWW MULTIPLAYER CHAMPIONS, DONNY MASON, DON TIRRI, TEAMMM THICCCNESSSSSIIIII!!!!

Father and son celebrate in the ring, with Donny leaping into Tirri’s arms! The two receive the gauntlets which are almost too small for their massive arms, but they just fit in. Ref Crash raises the giants arms in celebration, and the two stare down over their defeated foes.

Arthur La Forge: They did it! Don Tirri and his son Donny Mason are the NEW Multiplayer Champions!

Mary DeSue: OH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE! I’m…I gotta go!

Mary DeSue leaves commentary and quickly enters the ring, nearly tackling the Tirris with a hug. The fans cheer this, even though they normally don’t like her. She tries to yell something at Bert, but McAlroy ignores her as he and Ahmya begin to head to the back.

Arthur La Forge: Heartbreaking loss for Bert and Ahmya tonight, but you know they’ll want a rematch sooner or later. Until then, it’s the night of Team Thiccness!

---

Centurion vs. Larry Tact

“Pieces of Man” by Drown plays over the arena speakers as the lights cut out. Royal blue lights flicker on the stage while golden spotlights scan the crowd before focusing on Larry Tact at the top of the stage. He opens his arms and puffs out his chest, soaking in the crowd’s reaction before bellowing and making his way down the ramp, the spotlight following him. As he walks, Larry critiques some fans at ringside with petty insults before arriving to the ring He pulls himself up using the ropes and walks slowly along the apron before wiping his boots and entering the ring.

Mr Rad: Introducing first, from Manhattan, New York, weighing in at 260 pounds…representing Level Up, LARRYYYY TACT!!

Arthur La Forge: Larry Tact wasn’t content with a Power title shot, because as soon as he saw Centurion was interested in Level up, he did everything he could to get this match.

Mary DeSue: No one’s going to make a name for themselves at Larry Tact’s expense!

Arthur La Forge: Centurion has made a big enough name for himself without Tact, thank you very much. If anything, it’s Tact looking for notoriety.

Mary DeSue: Well he’s gonna get it!

A cover of The Offspring’s “You’re Gonna Go Far Kid” by Jonathan Young and Lauren Babic hits the speakers and Centurion strides out to the stage. He’s wearing a pair of shades and neat white suit and tie. He looks out at the fans and then, as the chorus hits, whips off the suit to reveal his wrestling gear underneath! He tosses the sunglasses out to the crowd and charges down the ramp, sliding underneath the bottom rope. Centurion climbs the turnbuckle and taunts to the crowd, before staring down Tact.

Arthur La Forge: Centurion has had an amazing 2021, and he could cap it off here by winning his Level Up Wrestling debut.

Mary DeSue: Yeah, but Tact’s group is already 2-0 tonight. This is TACT’S NIGHT. And so is tomorrow! All Tact, all the time!

Arthur La Forge: I wish you would show a little tact.

Tact and Centurion lock eyes, both waiting for the other to make the first move. The wiley vets are clued in from the start, knowing that any wrong move could result in punishment. Tact, always the instigator, tries to bait Centurion into making the first move. Centurion takes a swing at Tact, but Larry manages to lean back to avoid it. Unfortunately for him, the punch was merely a ruse, and it’s the follow-up blow that he should have been thinking about! Centurion spins around and connects with a knee to Tact’s gut. He drives his elbow into the back of Larry’s neck and locks in a side headlock. However Tact’s size makes it difficult to maintain the hold, so Centurion transitions to a hammer lock. Larry looks to escape by throwing an elbow but Centurion is again one step ahead, ducking the blow and lifting Larry into a back suplex! Cover!


ONE!

Tact kicks out immediately, and both men rush to their feet.

Arthur La Forge: Even ballgame so far.

Mary DeSue: Yeah well, it’s early. Tact’s just warming up.

Centurion smirks at Tact, who doesn’t seem the slightest bit amused. The two lock up and after some struggling Tact manages to overpower Centurion, backing him into the corner. Ref Kirby calls for a break but Tact continues to power Centurion into the turnbuckle. Kirby’s count reaches 4 and Tact does relent, releasing the hold and backing up…only to unleash a brutal open-palm chop that can be heard in the cheap seats! Centurion clutches his chest in agony and barely has a chance to catch his breath when Tact unleashes another chop! He whips Centurion to the opposite corner and charges in for a follow-up clothesline! Tact sends Centurion back to the other corner and looks for a second clothesline, but he moves! Dodging the blow at the last second, Centurion lets Tact smash into the turnbuckle head first, then follows up with a V TRIGGER! Cover!

ONE!

Tact kicks out at and immediately rolls out of the ring, looking to regroup.

Arthur La Forge: Hell of a shot from the UGWC and XWF star. Tact was knocked loopy!

Mary DeSue: But still TACTFUL enough to know to get out of there!

Centurion remains in the ring, refusing to head to the outside. Ref Kirby calls for Tact to get in the ring and he warily climbs up to the apron. Just as Tact bends down to climb through the ropes, Centurion pounces! He wails away on Tact’s back with left and rights, then rocks him with an uppercut. Tact staggers over to the corner and Centurion keeps up the pain by grinding his elbow across Larry’s face. Putting his back into it, Centurion lifts Tact up and seats him on the top turnbuckle. He connects with a sizzling chop, then throws in a few punches for good measure. He climbs up to the top rope and begins the 10-punch salute. Fans count along with each punch, and Centurion gets up to nine when suddenly Tact comes to life! Grabbing Centurion, he runs forward and plants him with a spinebuster! Tact takes a moment to recover then picks up his opponent and drops him back to the mat with a scoop slam! Tact bounces off the ropes and connects with a knee drop. Cover!

ONE!

TWO!

Centurion manages to kick out after that combination.

Arthur La Forge: Centurion is still in this! Tact doesn’t like it!

Mary DeSue: Look, I’m not saying Cent is bad, I’m just saying this is not his night!

Tact begins working over Centurion’s back, stomping on his spine repeatedly. He then pulls Centurion into a grapple, locking in an abdominal stretch! Tact appears to be taking delight in wrenching back on Centurion’s upper body, barking at Ref Kirby to ask him if he quits. Centurion grunts but doesn’t quit, and Tact looks to change that answer by jamming his elbow into his side. In a dire situation, Centurion reaches out with his hand…and JUST manages to touch the ropes! Kirby calls for a break, and Tact obliges, lifting Centurion up and planting him with a side slam! Tact hooks the leg.

ONE!

TWO!

Centurion powers out once again, and Tact shakes his head.

Arthur La Forge: Tact is started to get frustrated at Centurion’s resilience here.

Mary DeSue: Okay, I mean, I am too. Would have been over before now if it was somebody else.

Arthur La Forge: No doubt, but Centurion is showing his strength.

Tact shouts at Centurion, telling him to give it up, but it looks like it won’t be that easy to break his resolve. Tact slaps the back of Centurion’s head, showing complete disrespect for his opponent. Centurion clambers over to the ropes to get up but Tact capitalises. He drives his knee into the back of Centurion’s neck, using the ropes for extra leverage. The pain is evident on Centurion’s face, which is screwed up in agony. Ref Kirby’s count again reaches 4 before Tact breaks the hold and gives him a piece of his mind, telling him to back off. Kirby does so and Tact picks up where he left off. He lifts Centurion to his feet and hooks the arm, looking for a suplex…but Centurion blocks it! Using his leg to block Tact’s suplex attempt, he spins him around and plants him with a suplex of his own!

Arthur La Forge: Once again, Tact just can’t seem to hold Centurion down for long!

Mary DeSue: Oh no…come on Tact! Get up!

Centurion takes a moment to recover, but Tact is already up and charging at him! At the last second Centurion ducks his head and sends Tact over with a back body drop! Tact sits up into a seated position, only to be met with BLOODY SYMPATHY! The Busaiku flying knee nearly takes Tact’s head off, bouncing his noggin off the canvas.. Centurion pulls up Tact and hooks his arm from behind, looking for the 1000 MILE SLAM…NO! Tact manages to wriggle enough that it destabilises Centurion’s grip. He ends up losing his balance and backing into the ropes, dumping Tact to the outside! Centurion waits for Tact to get to his feet, then nails him with a baseball slide! The impact sends Tact flying over the announcers table, right into the lap of Arthur and Mary!

Arthur La Forge: LOOK OUT!

Mary DeSue: My costume! I’m out of here before it rips!

The commentary duo make themselves scarce as Centurion begins dismantling the announcer’s table, removing the monitors and earpieces. He grabs Tact and bounces his head off the table. Centurion climbs on top and brings Larry up with him, the crowd going wild for whatever he’s planning. Centurion kicks Tact in the gut, then looks for a PILEDRIVER…NO! Tact reverses, sending Centurion up and over! He lands on the Spanish Announce Table but the table DOES NOT BREAK! Centurion lands back first on the monitors with a sickening crunch and immediately grabs at his back in immense pain.

Arthur La Forge: We’re finally back here and oh my GOD, Centurion almost broke the Spanish table with his back!

Mary DeSue: Are…are those guys WaLuigis?

Arthur La Forge: I don’t want to know.

The commentary crew vacate the area as Tact clubs Centurion with some powerful right hands. Tact then does the ultimate disrespect to his opponent, spitting a lovely gob of mucus right onto Centurion’s face. Tact heads to the apron and then up to the top rope…what is he planning?! Tact steadies himself as the crowd gets to their feet. Larry then FLINGS HIMSELF OFF THE TOP ROPE…BUT THE DIVE TO BLUE MISSES AFTER CENT GETS OUT OF THE WAY! The crowd go crazy as the two combatants lie in the wreckage of the table and the Spanish announcers look on in disbelief.

Josewaluigi: ¡Oh Dios mío!

Ricardowaluigi: ¡AIYIYIWAHHHH!!!

Mary DeSue: WHEN did we get Spanish announcers?!

Centurion is the first to move, slowly getting up to one knee. He manages to stand and sets about bringing Tact back into the ring for a cover…BUT HE’S BLASTED FROM BEHIND! It’s Drake Wilcox and ISAAC, THE FACTION! The two big men start wailing away on Cent, with ISAAC jamming him back first into the apron. Cent tries to fight them off but The Faction overpower him, beating him down with kicks and strikes. ISAAC kicks Centurion to the gut and then powerbombs him right into the apron! The impact drives Cent’s back into the hardest part of the ring and he ragdolls onto the ground. Drake then gestures to the lone remaining announcer's table and ISAAC nods. They grab Centurion in a double goozle and lift him up, CHOKESLAMMING HIM THROUGH THE TABLE!!

Arthur La Forge: THIS IS ABSURD! The Faction are going to help Tact steal this one!

Mary DeSue: UGWC comes here, they get their game changed! Go back and cry about it!

Their work done, The Faction leave ringside just as quickly as they arrived. Both wrestlers are left completely devastated, lying in the wreckage of the tables. Ref Kirby slides out of the ring to check on both men, trying to ensure that they can both continue. Tact has begun to stir, but Centurion looks like he’s seeing stars. Kirby raises his arms in the X symbol, and the crowd boo as they don’t want things to end this way. Medical staff make their way down to ringside and Kirby whispers into his earpiece.

Mr Rad: Ladies and gentlemen, unfortunately we will be stopping this match as one competitor is no longer able to continue. As a result, your winner, LARRRRRRYYYY TAAAAACT!!

Arthur La Forge: This is ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. Tact and his goons might have just ruined the first night of Final Fantasy…and Centurion’s career!

Mary DeSue: Tact doesn’t care who you are! If you try to stop him, you get hurt! Now he can go and and get his Power title tomorrow and rule this place!

Tact is all too happy to get his hand raised, tainted victory or not. Kirby shrugs as there’s not much he can do now that Centurion is knocked out…OR IS HE?! Suddenly there’s a ruckus on the ramp as Cent, who was being carried away on a stretcher, comes to life. He fights his way out of the restraints and climbs off the stretcher. Medical staff try to stop him but Centurion is having none of it! He shoves the EMTs away and gingerly walks back to the ring. Seeing this, Kirby relays some further information to his earpiece.

Mr Rad: Disregard the previous statement, I’ve just received a message from The Developer…this match WILL be restarted, this time under NO DQ RULES!

Arthur La Forge: CENTURION WON’T SAY DIE!

Mary DeSue: WELL HE SHOULD! Tact’s gonna make him wish he did!

The crowd just about lose their minds as a grin forms on Tact’s face. Centurion seems pleased as well, and as Kirby gets the bell rung to restart the match, they start going at it! Trading rights and lefts the two bruised and battered fighters go all out, neither gaining a clear advantage. Centurion manages to block one of Tact’s blows and rocks him with a headbutt! Tact staggers back, allowing Centurion to nail him with a dropkick. Centurion then starts stalking Tact, waiting to pounce. Tact slowly gets back up to his feet again, and Centurion hooks his arm, drilling him to the mat with a 1000 MILE SLAM! He makes the cover.

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO!!

Tact just gets a shoulder up!

Arthur La Forge: I think Centurion might not have got all of that! He was hurting when he lifted Tact, which may have made it less impactful!

Mary DeSue: Oh sure, take any credit from Tact that you can. I see how it is.

Frustrated but not surprised by Tact’s resilience, Centurion rolls out of the ring. He starts searching under the apron, looking for...HIS TRUSTY GOLF CLUB! Centurion smiles and slides back into the ring. Raising the club, he brings down on Tacts’s back! And again! AND AGAIN!! Tact is flopping around like a fish, the shots stinging his back which has begun to turn bright red. Centurion then wraps the club around Tact’s head and begins choking him out with it! To apply more pressure, Centurion lifts Tact up to his feet, wrenching back on the club and Larry’s neck. Tact manages to reach out and grab the top rope but with no DQ comes no ropebreaks! Desperate to escape, Tact sticks his foot up and nails Centurion with a LOW BLOW! He collapses, clutching his groin, and finally setting Tact free.

Arthur La Forge: Ordinarily I’d complain, but it’s currently no DQ.

Mary DeSue: Yeah! You got so excited and now you see what happens!

Despite being in significant pain, Centurion is still holding on to the golf club, and Tact has to stomp on his hand to force him to let go. Tact then starts hitting Centurion for four! Savoring his payback, Tact smacking him over and over with the club, until the weapon starts bending in half. Having more uses for the club yet, Tact grabs his opponent and lifts him up. He hoists him up and over, then plants him with an URUNAGE SUPLEX!! The move drives Centurion back-first into the golf club in brutal fashion! But the big man is not done. He sits right on Centurion’s back, then grabs the club. Tact wraps it around his neck and wrenches back, locking in LARRY’S THRONE! The steiner recliner looks straight up nasty from the outside, and Centurion is completely trapped, the golf club slowly but surely forcing his windpipe closed.

Arthur La Forge: Centurion might have to give up here!

Mary DeSue: He should have given up ten minutes ago! This is what happens!

Tact’s eyes grow wild as he pulls back even further on the golf club. Centurion’s face contorts in agony, but he summons all his strength and tries to fight his way out. He throws elbows at Tact, but he’s unable to put any significant force behind them. Tact merely laughs at Centurion’s attempt to get out, and begins trash talking him in the hold.

Centurion's hand hovers above the mat…

Tact screams for a concession…

The crowd roars…

Centurion…

DOESN’T TAP!!

Instead he uses the last of his power to hoist Tact up, and drop him down back first!

Arthur La Forge: CENTURION IS STILL IN IT! These men are putting on a performance worth of the main event!

Mary DeSue: And there aren’t even any titles on the line! Just pride! Which Centurion doesn’t need! STAY DOWN!

The two men collapse in a heap, both sapped of nearly all their energy after a back-and-forth war. The crowd cheer in appreciation of the efforts of both men, who have given everything in this special attraction. The noise appears to rally the warriors and they begin to show signs of life. Tact is first to his feet, followed a beat later by Centurion. Tact charges at Centurion with a sudden burst of energy, but Centurion ducks down and grabs his legs, taking him down! The Centurion fans in attendance know what’s coming next. He immediately twists Tact over and locks in FALL OF ROME!! The boston crab twists Tact’s body in a way it was never meant to go, putting intense pressure on his back.

Arthur La Forge: Now it is Tact’s turn to try and get out of a submission attempt. Cent’s got the Fall of Rome in tight!

Mary DeSue: COME ON LARRY! You’re so close to winning!

Arthur La Forge: Being in a submission hold in a lot of pain is as far from winning as you can get, Mary.

Tact screams in pain, his hands scratching at the mat. He hasn’t got much left in the tank, and neither does Centurion, but that doesn’t mean the hold hurts any less. Tact crawls on his hands towards the ropes, though both men know the ropes don’t offer any kind of salvation. Still, Tact latches onto them, gripping them tight. Ref Kirby simply shrugs, but then Tact starts climbing THROUGH the ropes! Now Centurion is still clutching onto Tact’s legs, but the rest of him is outside the ring. With a mighty heave, Centurion manages to pull Tact back into the ring…but what he doesn’t see is what Tact has grabbed from underneath the ring! In a smooth motion, Tact twists his legs, causing Centurion to spin around too. In that motion, he connects with a CHAIR SHOT TO CENTURION’S FACE!

Arthur La Forge: TACT just KO’d Centurion with that!

Mary DeSue: YES! And it’s all legal, baby!

Centurion goes down like a sack of bricks, a small gash opening up on his forehead. Blood begins to stream down his nose as he lays on the mat motionless. Tact on the other hand has clawed his way up using the ropes. He staggers over to the chair and then sets it up, so it’s facing the corner. Tact drags Centurion over to the turnbuckle, and ascends to the middle rope.. Slowly but surely, Centurion begins to wake, but looks like he barely knows where he is. The blood has begun to form a small puddle on the mat when he stands, but TACT LEAPS OFF THE TURNBUCKLE! TACTFUL SURRENDER ONTO THE CHAIR!! The tequila sunrise jams Centurion’s head straight through the seat, destroying the chair and him in the process. Cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!

DING DING DING!!

Mr Rad: Here is your winner, representing Level Up…LARRRYYY TACT!!

Tact stays sitting on the mat, staring at Centurion. The usual smirk isn’t on his face, instead a look of almost hesitant admiration is there for the fight that Centurion put up. But that moment fades as he climbs to his feet and has his arm raised by Ref Kirby. Then it’s replaced by the usual gloating Tact, who climbs the turnbuckle to let the crowd know just exactly how good he is.

Arthur La Forge: Well, it took no DQs and a ton of interference to do it, but Tact finally beat Centurion.

Mary DeSue: YES! A tactful win! Full of TACTtics!

Arthur La Forge: But even Tact seems amazed at how much it took him just to keep Centurion down. We’ll see everyone tomorrow…for NIGHT TWO!

Medical staff come down to the ring to support Centurion, rolling him out of the ring. However as He is being strapped onto a stretcher, Centurion comes to and refuses to leave lying down. He shrugs off the help from the EMTs and somehow manages to stand. A bloody mess, Centurion slowly hobbles down the ramp clutching his neck. As he reaches the stage he turns back to lock eyes with Tact, who is still celebrating in the ring. The show fades to black as the two continue their knowing stare.

---

Intro Video: Joe
Show Intro: Jay
Natsume Rekara vs. Amber Payne: Tact
Android 69, PEEZEE & Valentine vs. The Faction: Tact
Joey Crash vs. Lord Raab vs. Kat Jones vs. Emily Simms: Dubs
Victoria Salinas vs. Chelsea Skye: Bert
Bert McAlroy & Ahmya vs. Don Tirri & Donny Mason: Dubs
Centurion vs. Larry Tact: Dubs
Judges: Joe, Jay, Duane, as usual

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