Post by jay on Apr 29, 2022 2:20:15 GMT -5
As the intro video finishes we fly over The Greensboro Coliseum in Greensboro, North Carolina. We then cut to the inside of the arena as we fly over the fans and see a variety of signs. "Work on my engine MECHANIC!!", "GOT WAHHH??!!", "THE INTERNET HERE SUCKS!!!", "WHERE IS A-69??? I got a handful for him!", "BERT 4:20", "THE ROUNDEST SHALL RULE!!", "You know what this fed needs...Pizza Party!", "The Power Gloves! They're So Bad!!", and "Game Changers...The Cheat Code you can depend on.". As we finish up panning around we stop at the announcers table to see Arthur La Forge and Mary DeSue. Arthur is wearing his Captain N Letterman's Jacket, and Mary DeSue is cosplaying as Squirrel Girl.
Arthur La Forge: Welcome everyone to EXP Twenty Four...Prelude To Doom!
Mary DeSue: That's just nuts...
Arthur La Forge: You wore that just to make that joke.
Mary DeSue: Duh...and my viewers did a poll on what I should wear this week. This character is apparently popular.
Arthur La Forge: Speaking of popular characters, boy do we have a showcase tonight. Starting off tonight we got Nocturne taking on...I can't really make this out. Oh well Nocturne is gonna be in action against a suprise opponent. Following that we have The Multiplayer Champions, Eli Goode and Brody Adams, also known collectively as, The Wayward Sons will take on WANK! and WaLink of the Waluigi World Order...
The screen starts to static as Arthur pulls out a squirt bottle from behind him and sprays near the camera.
Arthur La Forge: NO! BAD WALUIGIS!! NO!! NOT ON THE CARPET!!!
Mary DeSue: What a spritzshow.
Arthur La Forge: I should spray you with this for that comment.
Mary DeSue: You just wanna get me all wet Artie...
Arthur La Forge:...MOVING ON!!! In her debut match here in Level Up Samantha Voxx will take out Dude Waluigi in singles competition. Followed by Jason Ryan taking on Lord Raab in what is sure to be a slugfest!
Mary DeSue: Wow. Meaty men slapping meat...woo...
Arthur La Forge: Maybe a multiplayer match between Ahmya and Buster Gloves taking on the team of Emily Simms and Chelsea Skye will intrigue you then.
Mary DeSue: Oh a truly heartbreaking match...See...See what I did there Artie?
Arthur La Forge: I wish I hadn't, but after that match we got "The Final Boss" Champion, Joey Crash, taking on your favorite son...Donny Mason
Mary DeSue: GO FORTH SON OF THICCNESS!!
Arthur La Forge: Then we have Peter Vaughn taking on Victoria Salinas in singles competition, followed by Paul Freedom taking on Drake Wilcox, of the Game Changers. Following that Larry Tact defends his power title against Ziggy Morgan and EA Blizzard will defend his Courage Championship against Kat Jones in our main event!
Mary DeSue: This is so not fair. The Developer is totally against "The Game Changers".
Arthur La Forge: Possibly, and who knows what sick games that terrible foursome have planned.
Mary DeSue: Artie you're talking about foursomes and I'm dressed like a squirrel...
Arthur La Forge: ON WITH THE SHOW...You really need to stop that...
---
‘Commander Shepard’ starts to play and Duncan walks out onto the stage. He’s dressed in his streetwear, jeans, t-shirt and hoodie and he doesn’t waste any time making his way down to the ring.
Arthur La Forge: We’re being joined by the second ever winner of the Last of Us Gauntlet match and the next challenger to the Final Boss title.
Mary DeSue: He’s not got a match tonight, what’s he doing out here?
Arthur La Forge: Duncan was signed off from competition this week following what transpired after his match at EXP 23 and I suspect that that’s going to be related to why he’s headed down to the ring now.
Duncan takes a microphone from a crewmember at ringside. He jumps up onto the apron and in between the ropes. He takes his spot in the center of the ring. While waiting for his music to fade out Duncan rubs and moves his jaw, it clearly proving to be still uncomfortable for him.
Duncan Shepard: Joey Crash, get your arse out here. I’m about to talk a lot of crap about you and I don’t want anyone thinking I’m the slightest bit afraid to say every word of it to your face.
There’s a brief delay and then ‘Cheer Up London’ starts to play.
Joey Crash walks out onto the stage. He pauses for a moment then throws his trench coat open to show off the Final Boss title belt around his waist.
Arthur La Forge: Now here comes our Champion. We've got all the ingredients for fireworks gathering here.
Joey walks down the ramp and climbs into the ring. He stands off face to face with Duncan. The two of them jaw jack for a moment away from the microphones. Duncan then takes a step back, holding a hand up between himself and the champion as he raises the microphone to his mouth.
Duncan Shepard: Joey, Joey, Joey, I bet you’re really proud of what you pulled two weeks back after our match aren’t you. You took your shot and got a sly one over on me, just like you did to Bert. I don’t blame you for taking your shot. It worked on Bert, hell it got you that belt right there. Here’s the thing though Joey, if you think that all it’s going to take for you to stop me from taking that title away from you is one cheap brass assisted shot across the jaw you’re going to be exceptionally disappointed.
Duncan pauses for a moment, running his hand across his jaw again as he collects his thoughts.
Duncan Shepard: You know Joey when people talk about me, I do my best to listen. Before our match two weeks ago you said how when you first arrived here in Level Up you already had me in your sights because you wanted my Power title. Now though you think that because you’re standing there with that belt and I’m standing here with none that you’ve surpassed me in some way.
Duncan smirks.
Duncan Shepard: Here’s the thing though Joey, the only reason you’re the Final Boss champion right now is luck. You got a lucky backslide pin against Bert on a night where he was most overconfident. You were lucky to be chosen for the match at Final Fantasy that got you the last spot in the Last of Us Gauntlet. You were lucky that there was no obvious challenger for the Final Boss title at the start of this year and you were lucky that you could cut out the whole matter of actually having to win the Last of Us and just turn that Number 30 spot straight into a shot. Lastly, you got lucky that you were able to hit Bert with those brass knuckles without getting caught.
Duncan Shepard: Unlike you though every day I have been in Level Up has been about earning my shot. I earned my place in the Skeleton Key match at Dead By Daylight. I beat everyone to become the Power Champion, I beat everyone to hold it up to TriForce Heroes, then after Bert sidestepped me to get his shot I beat everyone else up until Final Fantasy. I’ve been pinned once since the first time I came down that ramp, once in three hundred and thirty seven days. I’ve been pinned fewer times in over three hundred days then you have been here in less than a hundred. Oh yes, I did the math.
Duncan Shepard: Here’s what I’m suggesting though Joey. I say, on May 10th at Doom, we throw the whole concept of luck out of the window. I’m going to deny you the chance to get another lucky brass knuckle shot by giving you one for free as soon as the bell rings. I say we say hell to luck. We say hell to the rules. I say we play a little pretend and imagine that this is not only me challenging you for the Final Boss title but we imagine this is you too challenging me for the Power title I once held and you once coveted so I can show you just what would have happened had your luck not drawn you away from me. I say quite simply this, at Doom, you and I Joey. We. Unleash. Hell.”
Joey Crash: That’s a nice little story you concocted there, Duncan. But there’s a hole in that neat little plot you just constructed. You’ve never stepped into the ring with Joey Crash. You weren’t able to escape unscathed while we were on the same team. And now you want to talk about the Power Championship? Way to bring up the past! But you’re right… I did want that Power Championship. I looked at you with disdain. I couldn’t stand the sight of you holding that championship while I still lived and breathed. My defense of the Final Boss Championship will cast a shadow so great nobody will ever remember you were the Power Champion!
Duncan Shepard: Is that so? I was the first ever Power Champion. I defended it with pride and strength and determination. My name will always be synonymous with that title and this company. You though and your reign as Final Boss champion, will only be remembered as a footnote in my story, as the transitional champion to the beginning of the second great Final Boss championship reign. Mine.
Joey seems like he might say something but instead he lunges forward and starts laying in rapid fire forearm strikes to the side of Duncan's headz driving him back to the ropes.
Arthur La Forge: Joey Crash has heard enough!
Mary DeSue: Duncan wants to unleash hell, well Joey is going to get started on it first.
Duncan pushes Joey away. The champion is quickly back in but Duncan replies with forearm strikes off his own. The two of them get stuck in mutual single collar tie-ups, each holding the other with their left arm while hammering them in the jaw with the right.
Referees and security personnel rush the ring.
Arthur La Forge: Now we've got people down to break this brawl up before it goes too far. Joey Crash still has to fight Donny Mason later tonight.
The referees and security pull Joey and Duncan apart while the two wrestlers struggle against them to get back to one another. The crowd chant 'Let Them Fight, Let Them Fight.'
Arthur La Forge: Looks like security have the situation under control, but we're only going to have to wait two more weeks to see these two men battle it out for the Final Boss title at our upcoming Pay Per View, Doom. You're not going to want to miss it.
---
Nocturne is already in the ring, waiting for her opponent to come out, when Mr. Rad appears on the big screen.
Mr. Rad: I’ve been informed that Nocturne’s opponent has decided to not show up tonight. Therefore we will be moving on to the next match…
Although half her face is hidden under a mask, Nocturne’s eyes narrow at this and she storms over towards the corner nearest the timekeeper’s table, asking for a microphone and receiving one moments later.
Nocturne: Oh, no. We’re not doing that tonight. See, I came to Greensboro to have a match, and I’m not leaving this ring until I get a match, or a fight. Either way works for me!
The crowd here seems to like the fire Nocturne is showing, even if they all know she isn’t likely to win anything from it. There is no movement on the top of the ramp, and Mr. Rad continues to look at her with a condescending look, as Nocturne speaks up.
Nocturne: Oh, y’all think I’m joking?
She rolls out of the ring, grabs a conveniently-placed steel chair, and slides back in, popping open the chair and seating herself in the center of the ring.
Nocturne: I’ve got nowhere else to be and all night to get there. Send someone from the back to fight me!
Normally, right about now is when the crowd would start getting bored of some jobber just wasting time, even if it’s more personality than she’s allowed to show. However, her faith is rewarded when WAHHHHH’RE TAKING OVER! hits the speakers, followed by the theme music of the Waluigi World Order as their entrance video removes Mr. Rad from view. At the top of the ramp emerge Walink, Dude Waluigi, Giant Waluigi, WANK, and in a rare appearance at the front of the group, Bizarro Waluigi in his green get-up. It is the latter who has a microphone in hand and addresses the masked woman in the ring.
Bizarro Waluigi: Now, Miss Nocturne, surely even you would not be so dull as to face the entire wWo at once, would you?
Nocturne’s reply is delayed for a few seconds by a crowd-pleasing “WANK” chant.
Nocturne: Let’s see. Three of you are already in matches tonight, and a fourth hides behind a microphone. Sounds to me like y’all have excuses to not come down here.
Bizarro Waluigi: There’s no need for insults and mud-slinging, Miss Nocturne. Surely we can’t come to a more agreeable settlement without debasing ourselves in such a childish manner?
Nocturne pauses for all of two seconds before replying.
Nocturne: Simple. The big man there doesn’t have a match tonight. Unless you’ve got Princess Waluigi hiding back there who wants to see some action, send the giant down here and let’s give these fans something more entertaining than me boring them to death waiting on the fight I was promised!
Bizarro Waluigi: But he hasn’t prepared for—
Nocturne: Oh, and I’m prepared to face a guy his size? Sounds to me like we’re on equal footing. Unless…the big bad giant is scared of a woman in a mask?
Dude Waluigi pulls the rest of the wWo into a huddle, and the microphone picks up various WAAAHs and little else. Even Bizarro’s comments in the huddle seem muted. Finally, with one more collecting WAAAH, the huddle breaks and Bizarro turns to face the ring.
Bizarro Waluigi: Very well. You wish to be stepped on by the giant that badly? Wish granted!
Nocturne: Good. Only thing stopping him now is open air and opportunity. Now get me a referee and ring the bell!
Nocturne stands, folding the steel chair and sliding it out of the ring along with the microphone as Giant Waluigi lumbers to the ring. One of the Level Up officials darts around him to slide into the ring as well, and as GW steps over the ropes and into the ring, the official calls for the bell!
Arthur La Forge: Well, I guess we’re doing this now!
Mary DeSue: She was gonna fight a big moron anyway, so not much difference!
Nocturne shows she’s not playing around right away by hitting Giant WaLuigi with a pump kick to the chest that knocks him into the corner. With the big goof winded, she begins to lay into him with a series of forearms to the chest and climbs up the ropes to begin to punch him in the face. She then grabs the ropes and begins to stomp down on to the chest and abdomen of GW from a standing position!
Arthur La Forge: Nocturne is very aggressive tonight!
Mary DeSue: She’s got a match coming up at the PPV, she has to be!
Nocturne grabs GW by the wrist and walks him out, as he’s still dazed. She attempts an Irish Whip and GW reverses it, sending her running to the ropes. She bounces back and he actually hits a shoulder block, which knocks her backwards into the ropes. He runs and attempts a clothesline but she ducks underneath. GW hits the ropes chest-first and stumbles back, allowing Nocturne to jump up on his back, grab the head and spin around with the PATH TO DECAY! But instead of covering, she gets up onto the ropes and soaks in the reaction of the crowd.
Arthur La Forge: I don’t know how smart this is. She’s been beaten this way before and WaLuigis have gotten lucky!
Mary DeSue: I refuse to believe a WaLuigi has ever gotten lucky.
Arthur La Forge: Apparently that’s a very popular character so I mean, you never know…
But GW is still loopy and up to his hands and knees, so Nocturne runs over and stomps his back to knock him back down. She keeps stomping, making a point to drive the heel of her boot into his back. She lifts GW up and taunts him a little, and the Giant pushes her away out of frustration. She runs for a spinning heel kick and GW actually drops down to avoid it, gets up and runs off the ropes. She ducks his second clothesline attempt, he comes back and ATTEMPTS A CROSSBODY BLOCK! The big man leaves his feet but Nocturne rolls under to avoid it and he hits the canvas! He gets back up and she leaps up to the ropes and jumps off with THE WITCHING HOUR! And the pin!
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!!
Mr. Rad: Here is your winner….NOCTURNE!
Arthur La Forge: And just like that, Nocturne picks up a needed win.
Mary DeSue: If this is the Nocturne that fights Jack Sullivan at Doom, that is gonna be a bad debut for her!
Nocturne stares down at GW for a moment, before the other WaLuigis come in and help him out. At least Dude does, as WANK and WaLink have action after the ad break.
---
Eli Goode & Brody Adams vs. The WaLuigi World Order
The Multiplayer champions, The Wayward Sons, have arrived in the ring where the wWo are still waiting.
Arthur La Forge: It seems the beatings are going to continue until WaLuigi morale approves.
Mary DeSue: How LUCKY are we to get three WaLuigi matches in one night?
Arthur La Forge: I can hear your eyes rolling.
Brody starts out the match for his team while WANK decides to start for his. Adams feigns like he wants to lockup but instead kicks WANK in the abdomen and delivers a series of clubbing blows to his back. He then first off a short uppercut for good measure and WANK is forced into the corner. Adams follows and hits another kick, then he starts clubberin’ with a series of windmill strikes to WANK, who has no defense. Adams continues to beat down WANK in the corner, followed by stomps, until referee Crash almost hits five and he stops.
Arthur La Forge: It seems Brody Adams is not pleased about losing to the Game Changers last show.
Mary DeSue: Well he’d better get used to it! All the Game Changers know how to do is win!
Brody grabs WANK out of the corner and pulls him forward, right into a sidewalk slam! He rolls over to his own corner and tags in Eli Goode, before rolling back outside. Eli comes in as WANK is trying to regain his bearings and runs, hitting him with a Sling Blade! He then hoists WANK up and staring right at WaLink, almost daring him to come in, he drives a knee into WANK’s abdomen, doubling him over. He then runs off the ropes and leaps into the air, CRASHING down onto WANK with the Goode Lord!
Arthur La Forge: These poor WaLuigis are getting decimated tonight!
Mary DeSue: Must be Tuesday.
WaLink finally comes in but Brody is already in himself, running and flattening him with a BRODYLINE! Goode covers WANK.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!!
Mr. Rad: Here are your winners, the Multiplayer Champions, ELI GOODE AND BRODY ADAMS!
Arthur La Forge: A quick win for the champions. WaLink should have stayed on the apron!
Mary DeSue: The wWo will never learn.
The champions take their Power Gloves and head to the back. Giant WaLuigi comes out and scoops WANK off the mat to carry him backstage. Dude is the last one there and he sticks around for his match after a brief trip backstage.
—
Heading backstage, we find Lenny Brasco standing by.
Lenny Brasco: Level Up fans, I’m here and ready with plenty of deals you’ll think are absolute steals! First we have some merchandise in our “Level Up: Year One” collection, including commemorative Final Fantasy: Night One and Night Two posters…
He holds up a framed poster depicting various featured Level Up talent.
Lenny Brasco: As a bonus, we have a limited number of these posters that are autographed by some of the Level Up wrestlers including Duncan Shepard, Sidroy Covington III, Jenny, and Dionysus, who were all involved in the Power, Wisdom, and Courage title matches at Final Fantasy! If that wasn’t a good enough deal, it also has signatures from the EPIC Final Boss title match, Bert McAlroy and—
Before he can continue, Lenny stops and looks to one side from where a ruckus of noise is coming. He gasps slightly as we see the Game Changers strut into view. Larry Tact grabs the framed poster and observes it, then eyes Lenny.
Larry Tact: What’d you say this was, Brasco? A signed poster? It seems you’re missing the signatures of the wrestlers who made the biggest impacts of all at Final Fantasy, the Game Changers. I’m not surprised, considering the Developer will do anything to keep from having to shell out extra coin on royalty checks. A pity, it makes this almost completely worthless.
Lenny Brasco: All due respect, Larry, I’d say this is a WONDERFUL collector’s item for any die-hard Level Up fan!
Larry Tact: You know, they should really just update your name on the website to ‘Level Up LAP-dog’ Lenny, because whenever we see you, you’re busy trying to lap up attention to yourself and your schilling. Who does that? What a waste of airtime, am I right, guys? What do we do with garbage like this?
He indicates the poster, and Drake comes to the front and grabs the poster, smashing the frame on the ground, twisting it with his bare hands and then ripping the poster out and tearing it to shreds. Wild-eyed, he looks at the camera.
Drake: Oops! I don’t know my own strength sometimes! But you’re damn right Larry IT IS a complete waste of airtime! Lenny peddling this flimsy rubbish is embarrassing! Especially when it doesn’t get the GC seal of approval! A wonderful collectors item! Ha! Don’t make me laugh Lenny! You’re a joke! The Developer allowing you to run around with this stuff is a joke.
Larry Tact: That media hog, Applesauce, went as far as calling Drake out as the ‘weakest’ of the Game Changers on the Level Up Strategy Guide. It’s pointless to make that claim because there is simply ZERO weakness among us. At Final Fantasy, Centurion and Duncan Shepard found that not only am competitively superior to them, but that I had a superior strategy. Now Isaac has shown how much he's grown by taking down Centurion, himself. EAB has taken the Courage division by storm and is molding it as any sound businessman would. We’ve been moving through Level Up’s ranks and taking what we please.
He unclasps the Power Championship and momentarily raises it up, as EAB motions to the Courage Championship.
Lenny Brasco: If I may ask, Larry, it seemed there were several wrestlers who came out to oppose the Game Changers recently. They included–
Larry raises a hand to Lenny.
Larry Tact: Heel, Lapdog. You would call that random collection a ‘resistance?’ They just as likely could have stumbled out onto the stage from the back, without realizing what they were doing.
EAB steps up to Lenny, who is looking dwarfed with them on either side, and Drake and Isaac behind them.
EAB: Leonard, if I may?
He gestures at the mic but since it didn’t seem to happen quick enough Drake and Isaac flank Brasco as Blizzard takes the microphone.
EAB: What Lawrence here is trying to tell you in clear layman terms is that any and all of those posters would at least triple their value if you had it signed by the stars that complete the quatro that is Game Changers. We are the four pillars that support this company, we are elevating it and the so-called “resistance” is just a bunch of glory hogs who think they can waltz into the spotlight assuming they can have the glory and praise. We are the ones putting in the work, we are the ones with the gold and you do realize if the last EXP had been a championship match we would hold Power, Courage and the Multiplayer championships. We are a real team, a cohesive unit on all fronts and it upsets these ruffians, these hooligans and these individuals who see this great company as a quick paycheck gosh darn meal ticket. Lawrence Tact, myself, Drake and Isaac we see things for a whole lot longer term and we are working head and shoulders to give these fans a far superior product that they have been used to and since we aren’t selfish such as those who oppose us a far better Level Up Wrestling than our supposed opposition wants them to have. However because they pander to the mouth breathing unwashed masses with childish or at most sophomoric hijinxs and pranks, they are praised and cheered, not because our fans prefer it but because they are dumbing down the whole fanbase to match their level while the Game Changers are here to educate and entertain, we’ve made our matches, our appearances, our interviews something better: edutainment and where are our thanks? Where is the gratitude from those who are pocketing the profits and proceeds of the fruits of our labor? Where Leonard, did you pocket them?
Lenny looks anxiously as the Game Changers begin to bear down on him, when suddenly Larry stops and looks up at someone off camera…
CENTURION walks right up into the frame, causing a sour look to form on Larry’s face. Suddenly, ISAAC steps up and engages in a stare down with Cent. The shot then zooms out and we find Eli Goode, Brody Adams, and Paul Freedom stepping up behind Centurion! The only one between the two sides is Lenny Brasco, who looks to either side of him and sensing the tension… Slowly. Backs. Away.
Larry begins to smirk then clears his throat… and SPITS at the opposing group! THE BRAWL IS ON!! Everyone is trying to tear each other apart and we see Level Up referees and officials come swarming in to try and separate them. Amidst the mayhem the camera takes a hit and is knocked down, creating static as we cut away.
---
Samantha Voxx vs. Dude WaLuigi
Arthur La Forge: The Game Changers are finally meeting people not willing to let them take over Level Up…but it’s gonna end up tearing the place apart!
Mary DeSue: Then maybe they should just let The Game Changers take over! They’re gonna win anyway!
Arthur La Forge: And now we still have a night of action to get to folks, so let’s take it to the ring for the debut of Samantha Voxx!
Dude WaLuigi is already strutting and dancing as Samantha Voxx enters the ring, and even when the bell rings, he hasn’t stopped. Dude takes a kick to the ribs for his trouble and then Voxx hauls off and hits him in the face with a right hand, then hits a few more, backing him into the ropes. One Irish Whip later and Dude bounces off the other side and Voxx lowers the head, only for Dude to grab her and send her flying with an Irish Whip! When she comes back, the Dudester hits her with a little Sweet Shin Music, knocking her to her knees! He then starts to dance, celebrating his offense.
Arthur La Forge: Dude WaLuigi is likely the only one of the group that’s competent but he’s…
Mary DeSue: Stupid.
Arthur La Forge: Yeah.
Dude throws Voxx into the corner and runs in with something, but Voxx gets the boots up into his face. She then throws him into the opposite corner and charges in, but Dude actually gets a back elbow! He then charges out and flattens Voxx with a clothesline…but she simply rolls through it and pops back onto her feet! Dude is stunned by this development and swings again, but she ducks that and hits a pele kick! Voxx then grabs Dude by the head and throws him face first into the nearest turnbuckle.
Arthur La Forge: Voxx just ate that clothesline and popped back up like it’s nothing!
Mary DeSue: I mean, it probably was.
Arthur La Forge: DW gave everything he had, Mary. Give him some credit.
Voxx begins to hit Dude with a series of mid kicks in the corner, before pounding away at the head of Dude. She then backs up and leaps in at him, hitting a diving forearm to the face. She then hooks him up and runs off the corner to plant him with a tornado DDT! She doesn’t let go of his head, instead lifting him up while he’s dazed and hitting THE FOREST OF DREAMS! Cover!
ONE!
TWO!
NO! VOXX lifts his head up, then turns him over and locks in her submission, TRUTH OF THE SPIRIT! With both arms hooked Dude submits the only way he can, by speech..
Dude WaLuigi: WAAAAAAHHH HAVE MERCY!
The bell rings and that’s it!
Mr. Rad: Here is your winner…SAMANTHA VOXX!!
Arthur La Forge: Samantha Voxx was not pleased to get a WaLuigi in her debut and seems to have made him pay.
Mary DeSue: She’s got a mean streak! I like it! And her hair!
Arthur La Forge: Poor Dude should take a few weeks off, he might have got himself injured tonight.
The wWo come out, all beaten and bruised, to gather up their member. The lights suddenly turn red, however, and Voxx stares out at them, before they turn black. When they come back on, Voxx has disappeared…
Arthur La Forge: I don’t even want to know.
Mary DeSue: She sure can make an exciting exit, can’t she?
---
Jason Ryan vs. Lord Raab
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Ryan and Raab start off this contest the best way possible...punching the shit out of each other! Rights and lefts back and forth until Ryan gets a kick to the knee of Raab in and hits a DDT on "The Big German Monster"! Ryan quickly goes up top and hits a Cannonball Senton onto Lord Raab! Ryan gets up and runs the ropes just as Lord Raab sits up and gets a running knee to the face from "The Dreamkiller"! Ryan picks up Raab and tosses him into the ropes. Ryan goes for a superkick but Raab grabs the ropes to put a stop to the bounceback. Ryan charges forward and Raab pulls the top rope sending Ryan to the floor on the outside!
Arthur La Forge: These two hoss’s are gonna tear each other apart and I love it!
Mary DeSue: MEAT SLAPPINNNNNNNNNNN…
Raab quickly gets on the apron on the outside over the top rope as Ryan starts to get up...
ONE...
Running flying elbow drop from Lord Raab right to the side of Ryan's head!
"THAT WAS EPIC!! THAT WAS EPIC!!"
Lord Raab quickly gets up and tosses Ryan in under the ropes. The treat of seeing the monster go airborne is not lost on this Greensboro crowd as Raab gets back int othe ring and grabs Ryan into a Bearhug into the center of the ring! Ryan struggles as he tries to get a base of sorts and starts pummeling Lord Raab in the head, but it doesn't seem to have the effect that Ryan wants. Finally Raab let's Ryan down, only to toss Ryan into the ropes and on the rebound...SPINEBUSTER! Raab hold out his hand and hits a clawhold onto the head of Ryan, but Ryan, thru the pain, quickly grabs the ropes causing Lord Raab to break the hold. Ryan rolls to the outside.
Arthur La Forge: Lord Raab is not one to do things like suicide dives a lot, so him even leaping to the outside was a rare occurance.
Mary DeSue: A rare drop…like a winning lotto ticket…never forme though.
Ryan gets back into the ring and starts saying something to Lord Raab. Raab responds by charging at Ryan, who ducks the shot and comes up behind Raab. German suplex...no...Rolling German Suplexes with a release on the third one. Ryan gets up and shouts down at Raab, who sits up. Ryan backs away as Raab gets up and charges at Ryan. Ryan ducks a grab from Raab. Raab hits the rebound on the ropes...SPINEBUSTER FROM RYAN TO RAAB! Ryan wastes no time and heads up to the turnbuckle to the top rope. Raab sits up after a moment and stands only to get taken down by a top rope "Pink Eye"...
Arthur La Forge: A top rope superkick right into the eye! That had to hurt, but you gotta wonder if that mask gives any kind of protection to that shot.
Mary DeSue: He got kicked in the eye! Duh!
Ryan is calling for the end of this match by signaling for "The Dreamkiller", but as he goes to set up the Leaping Cradle Piledriver, Lord Raab hits a back body drop on Ryan! Lord Raab grabs Ryan and hits "The Killbuster"!! Cover!!
One...
Two...
THREE!!! RYAN KICKS OUT RIGHT AS THE REF'S HAND HIT THE MAT!
DING!DING!DING!
Mr.Rad: Here is your winner...Lord Raab!
Raab quickly gets out of the ring as Jason Ryan argues with the referee, Kirby, who gets shoved for his trouble by "The Dreamkiller" as the two continue to argue.
Arthur La Forge: Ryan’s arguing with Kirby that the count was too fast, but the decision still stands.
Mary DeSue: Ugh. Now Meat isn’t slappin…
—
“Fortune Days” by the Glitch Mob hits and Cypher makes his way down the ramp to a chorus of boos and jeers. He calmly climbs into the ring and takes a microphone from one of the ring crew.
Cypher: I’m sure you’re all so glad to see me again.
The capacity crowd lets “The Superior Design” hear it, but he pays them no mind.
Cypher: Well I didn’t wanna come back either, not to this joke of a federation run by a poorly-programmed artificial intelligence, but there’s some unfinished business for me here.
He smirks, rubbing the back of his head through his hoodie.
Cypher: Ataxia, you brainless freak, did you think I was going to forget what you’ve done to me? The first time we fought, you tried to maim me. The second time, you meddled in my gauntlet, which was supposed to belong to ME. Not scrubs like you and Android 69, boy I hope he gets reprogrammed into something with actual intelligence.
The sly dig at Android 69 is not lost on the audience.
Cypher: So I’ve come back to Level Up for one thing, and that’s to finally rid myself of the guy who has tried to humiliate me at every opportunity. So how about it, Ataxia? You and me, one on one at DOOM. I know you’re back there, don’t hide, I want an answer right now.
Cypher turns to face the stage, motioning for Ataxia to show himself.
Arthur La Forge: Ataxia isn’t here. Ataxia hasn’t been seen in we…
“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA…”
Mary DeSue: Oh yeah you totally know what’s going on Artie…
“Hey Dumbass…Yooo hoooooooo…Up hereeeee…”
Cypher looks up to see Ataxia up in the rafters. The bag masked freak is spotlighted and holding a microphone.
Ataxia: I love how you seem to think that those matches were yours. I love how you seem to think that you are owed something. That. I could let go. Let slide. But that outfit…
Cypher looks down at the fashionable attire he has on and scoffs.
Ataxia: You look like The Gap gave your mom a reach around while shooting a money shot and called it Abercrombie and Bitch!
Cypher: Now look he…
Ataxia: SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I RAIN HELLFIRE UPON THEE WITH FURIOUS VENGENCE POSER! YOU WANTED A FUCKING MATCH…You got one…Except I pick the stipulations and I know…I know you’re going to love this one…Hall Of Mirrors!
Cypher: You’re on freakshow!
Ataxia: Yeah…one more thing pretty bitch…Kiss my glass!!
Ataxia reaches over and throws down a sheet of glass that almost hits Cypher before he rolls out of the way.
Ataxia: I’ll be seeing you at your DOOM!!! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…
The lights fade out as Metallica's “Die Die Die My Darling” starts to play. The lights come back up and Cypher looks at the shattered glass in the ring and back up at the rafters as a bag like mask falls into the ring.
Arthur La Forge: A Hall of Mirrors Match at Doom between Cypher and Ataxia!
Mary DeSue: What else could get added to this Carnival of Carnage!
—
Ahmya & Buster Gloves vs. Emily Simms & Chelsea Skye
DING! DING! DING!
As we start out we see the team of Ahmya and Buster Gloves are wearing Bert Tribute Facepaint on their faces. The referee, Pliskin, motions for the two teams to pick a member to start. Amhya starts out for her team while Chelsea Skye starts out for hers. Buster looks away from the opposing teams corner as Emily Simms looks at Buster. Ahmya and Skye lock up with Skye winning the lock up and putting Ahmya in a headlock. Skye shoves Ahmya into the ropes. Ahmya hits the ropes and comes back going for a leaping forearm but Skye ducks it. Ahmya rebounds off the ropes and comes back and gets hit by Skye with a spear! Skye wastes little time in setting up Ahmya with a sharpshooter to try and wear down her back and legs. Skye gets her trapped in the center of the ring, but "The Wisdom Champion" fights thru the pain and walks on her hands to the ropes. Referee Pliskin tells Skye to break the hold...
One...
Two...
Skye breaks the hold but kicks Amhya in the swole of the back to keep her from getting up.
Arthur La Forge: Good plan from Skye to keep "The Roundest" down!
Mary DeSue: Ugh...these nicknames...it's almost as bad as the facepaint...
Skye grabs Ahmya and throws her into the ropes. Ahmya rebounds and Skye looks to be going for a superkick, but Ahmya grabs the ropes before she hits the rebound. Skye charges forward and Ahmya runs forward and hits a tilt a whirl headscissors sending Skye to the mat. Ahmya and Skye are both down as Buster starts clapping trying to get the fans up. Ahmya gets to her corner first and tags in Gloves who rushes in and grabs Skye just before she can tag in Simms! German Suplex to Skye from Gloves! Gloves quickly picks up Skye and throws her into the ropes and hits the "DIRTY BERTY"
!!!...It is the worst looking standing Spanish Fly, but it does the job!Arthur La Forge: That was not the greatest Spanish Fly in the world...
Mary DeSue: Considering who he did it for...perfect tribute...
Gloves may have hurt himself a bit doing that move, but gets up and starts shaking his arm to get the stiffness out as Skye slowly crawls over to her corner with Simms holding out her hand. Buster grabs Skye's leg as Skye is standing up and...Enzugiri! Gloves grabs the side of his head as Skye tags in Simms. Gloves rolls over to his corner and looks at Simms. The two stare down at each other as Gloves gets up and tags in Ahmya, not even wanting to look at Simms. Ahmya leaps over the ropes and charges forward at Simms and both start beating each other with lefts and rights! Simms gains the upper hand and hits a belly to belly suplex on Ahmya and follows it up with a "LONDON BRIDGE" in her corner! Ahmya is in pain as Simms tags in Skye who goes up top...Simms releases the hold and "Sky's The Limit"!
One...
Buster gets into the ring and goes to break the count but is stopped by Referee Pliskin! From out of the back we see Riley Heart run down to ringside and go up top. CANNONBALL SPLASH ONTO THE BACK OF CHELSEA SKYE!!! Heart slides Ahmya onto Skye and rolls out of the ring as Simms starts to chase her around the ring. Buster goes to the outside as Pliskin see's the turn around...
Cover!!
One...
Two...
THREE!!!
Mr. Rad: Here are your winners...The team of...Buster Gloves and Ahmya!!!
Gloves is already heading up the ramp as Ahmya stands in the ring confused as to what happened as Skye argues with Pliskin. There is a moment where Simms stares up at Buster and Buster returns the stare, until Heart shoves Simms out of the way and heads up the ramp and grabs Buster's arm.
Arthur La Forge: Ohhh It's getting personal up in here...
Mary DeSue: I love this...it's better than a soap opera...or pro wrestling...I GOT IT!! A Soap Opera WITH Pro Wrestling!
Arthur La Forge: You are a woman ahead of your time Mary...but this is not over for sure...this tangled web is about to get more tangled I'm sure.
---
Joey Crash vs. Donny Mason
Mason begins the match looking to physically impose himself on Joey Crash, who in turn tries to evade him and chip in with a kick or jab every now and then. Eventually Crash manages to take Donny down with a drop toe-hold and immediately applies a front face-lock. Unfortunately he can’t hold the big man down, and Donny powers up. Using his impressive strength, Mason YEETS Crash into the air! What goes up must come down, and Crash smashes into the mat. Crash is quick back up to his feet, but Donny is already bouncing off the ropes, taking him out with a running big boot! Cover!
ONE!
Crash kicks out.
Arthur La Forge: Donny has the right idea, but it’s a bit early to go for the pin here…
Mary DeSue: You keep your mouth shut. THE SON OF THICCNESS SHALL PREVAIL!!!
Donny reaches down to pull Crash up but gets a thumb to the eye! Crash scampers out of the ring, and Donny is close behind him. They go around the ring on the outside, then Crash is the first back into the ring. Donny climbs up on the apron to follow him, but Crash quickly grabs his head and guillotines him on the top rope. This stuns Donny, and allows Crash to throw some jabs into his body. Crash then slips out of the ring again, taking out Donny’s legs from under him as he does so! Donny’s head collides with the ring apron, and he’s seeing stars for a moment. In an unusual move for him, Crash heads skyward. He climbs to the top rope and as Donny gets back into the ring, takes him out with a missile dropkick! Cover!
ONE!
TWO!
Donny kicks out.
Arthur La Forge: Another few moments and it would have been over for Donny.
Mary DeSue: COME ON THICCI JUNIOR!! KICK HIS A[BLEEP]!!!
Crash tries to keep on Donny, throwing some powerful boxing strikes, but the big man just absorbs them! He pushes Crash back then sizzles his chest with an open-palm slap that can be heard in the cheap seats. Donny backs Crash onto the ropes and whips him off. On the rebound Donny picks up Crash and nails him with a sidewalk slam. Not done, Donny scales the turnbuckle, then walks across the top rope…SICK FLIP! NO! That dastardly Crash got his knees up! Donny is quickly back to his feet, and looks to pull up Crash, NO! SMALL PACKAGE!
ONE!
TWO!
Donny kicks out.
Arthur La Forge: That small package almost…
Mary DeSue: What did you say?
Arthur La Forge: The move…it’s called a small package.
Mary DeSue: Oh! I thought for all these months that was a condition for some folks not the name of a move.
Both men up, Crash tries again to hobble Donny with a low dropkick, which connects…but only knocks Donny to one knee. Crash off the ropes, looking for a running knee strike…BUT DONNY CATCHES HIM! Donny lifts him into the air with a belly-to-belly suplex! This throw sends Crash into the turnbuckle causing a nasty landing. Donny walks over to Crash and lifts him up, trying to hit a German suplex out of the corner! But Crash manages to hold onto the top turnbuckle! Donny heaves back but Crash is maintaining his grip on the turnbuckle. Ref Crash comes over to make sure that Crash isn’t trying to take the pad off…WHEN DONNY COLLAPSES! CRASH’S LOW BLOW WAS OUT OF VIEW OF THE REF!
Arthur La Forge: A LOW BLOW BUT THE OFFICIAL DIDN’T SEE!!
Mary DeSue: NOOOOOO!!!
Crash quickly capitalizes, nailing a SPINNING BACKFIST! He rolls up Donny and gets his feet on the ropes! Ref Crash sees the pin but doesn’t notice Crash’s feet on the ropes!
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!!
DONNY KICKS OUT TOO LATE!
DING DING DING!
Mr Rad: Here is your winner … JOEYYYY CRASH!!
Arthur La Forge: Joey Crash used the ropes for leverage! He cheated!
Mary DeSue: I’m gonna stab him in the [the next five minutes are pleasant birds chirping cause you youngins can’t hear this!]
Joey Crash quickly escapes the ring and runs up the ramp, eager to get away before Donny Mason can realize what’s happened. Crash quickly heads to the back while Mason remains fuming in the ring.
---
Peter Vaughn vs. Victoria Salinas
DING! DING! DING!
Salinas and Vaughn start off with a collar and elbow tie up which Vaughn wins and puts Salinas into a headlock, and quickly follows it up with a bulldog into the mat. Vaughn gets up and rubs Salinas face into the mat which she then rolls out of the ring. She rubs her nose for a moment and then glares at Vaughn. Vaughn smiles at her and makes a come on motion as Salinas gets back into the ring and charges Vaughn. Vaughn ducks and as Salinas turns around, he kicks her in the gut, and hits a Snap DDT! Vaughn grabs Salinas' leg and slams her knee into the mat and follows it up by putting her leg in a grapevine hold. Salinas quickly crawls over and grabs the ropes, but as Vaughn gets up he kicks her knee as the referee, Pliskin, tells him to back off.
Arthur La Forge: Vaughn is definitely trying to play head games with Salinas.
Mary DeSue: That disrespect is gonna bite him. You know how she hates people who treat her bad.
Salinas rolls out of the ring to catch her breath, and work out her knee from the assault she just had. She turns just as Vaughn leaps out into a suicide dive. Salinas dodges and Vaughn eats the ring barrier! Salinas quickly rolls Vaughn back into the ring and waits for him to get up. Jumping Yakuza Kick to the face, sends Vaughn back into the ropes where he gets tied up. Pliskin pulls Salinas off of Vaughn while he tries to untie "The Mechanic", but when he does Vaughn shoves Pliskin back into Salinas. Salinas shoves Pliskin out of the way and hits a running knee to the face of Vaughn. Vaughn falls down to the mat and Salinas locks him into an Elevated Boston Crab!
Arthur La Forge: Elevated Boston Crab! This could get Salinas a submission win!
Mary DeSue: I’ve been watching this stuff for over a year and I swear you make up these move names.
Salinas has the hold locked in, but Vaughn isn't out yet as he gets up on his hands and crawls over to grab the ropes. Salinas lets go upon the hold being broke and reaches down to get Vaughn, who tries to school boy her, but Salinas kicks out of it. Vaughn is now back up on his feet and Salinas rolls up and hits the ropes. Running roundhouse kick to the face sends Vaughn down to the mat. Salinas goes up top and goes for a springboard moonsault, but Vaughn gets his knee's up and Salinas ends up grabbing her ribs. Vaughn goes up top quickly and hits "The Plunge"! Cover!
One...
Two...
THREE!!!
Salinas gets kicks out right as Pliskin hits the three and she is livid as Vaughn slides out of the ring and blows her a kiss as he heads up the ramp.
Mr. Rad: Here is your winner…Peter Vaughn!!!
Arthur La Forge: Salinas is mad, and rightfully so. That was almost to close to call.
Mary DeSue: She went high risk and it didn’t pay off. Happens to the best of us. Hope it doesn’t bring her down.
---
Paul Freedom vs. Drake Wilcox
The bell rings and the monstrous Drake Wilcox stares down at the rookie Paul Freedom, who literally has his biggest challenge in front of him. Wilcox lunges forward to grab the smaller Freedom and Paul ducks under his grip and moves away. Wilcox tries again and again Freedom avoids it, then avoids another swipe with the massive paw of his opponent. Wilcox then looks as though he might have maneuvered Freedom into the corner and begins slowing boxing him in, but makes the mistake of going for a lunge and Freedom gets out. This time, however, Freedom turns around and begins to hit a whole range of punches, from jabs to haymakers, basically anything he can at various points of the body of his opponent.
Arthur La Forge: Look at Paul Freedom go!
Mary DeSue: He'd better hope one of those knocks the big man out or he's dead!
Wilcox takes a swing at Paul while he's punching and Paul immediately backs away. Wilcox steps forward and Freedom hits him with a huge haymaker to the jaw, but it only seems to be a glancing blow as Wilcox keeps coming. The pattern continues. The larger opponent takes a huge swing, Freedom avoids it and hits a series of rapid-fire punches of his own.
Arthur La Forge: It appears to be a stalemate. Wilcox cannot catch Freedom but Freedom's strikes are having little effect.
Mary DeSue: Then why even...?
Arthur La Forge: Hang on Mary, it's possible Freedom as a strategy in mind...
Wilcox takes another swing and Freedom ducks it. He reaches up to hit another haymaker and Wilcox catches his hand! He lifts Freedom up with ONE ARM while simply clutching his first, but Freedom manages to wiggle free in mid-air and land on top of Wilcox, before scrambling and locking him in a sleeper! Freedom squeezes with everything he's got and Wilcox is walking around with the smaller man on top of him, but it seems his steps are becoming slower and more labored. Finally, Wilcox drops to a knee and starts grabbing at the arms of Freedom. He gets back to his feet and FLIPS FREEDOM OFF HIS BACK! Freedom flies through the air and lands with a thud on his back.
Arthur La Forge: Wilcox was going to catch him eventually and he just did.
Mary DeSue: Yeah, and now he's gonna pay.
Wilcox lifts Freedom up and ragdolls him into the corner, before hitting him with a huge knee to the midsection! Freedom immediately collapses and Wilcox decides to step on him, using the ropes to his advantage and standing on the back of Paul Freedom! Referee Kirby gives him until the count of five and Drake Wilcox is off at four. However he decides to do it again after the rope break, taking another four count before getting off. Wilcox reaches down and lifts Freedom to his feet, scoops him up and hits a sidewalk slam! Cover!
ONE!
TWO!
Th--Freedom kicks out!
Arthur La Forge: Drake nearly squashed him and somehow he still got the shoulder up!
Mary DeSue: Okay fine, so the kid's tough. Big deal.
Drake adds a leg drop for good measure, before lifting him to his feet. Freedom attempts a series of wild punches to the abdomen but it doesn't seem to faze Wilcox, who hits a headbutt to knock him back down. He then drops a huge elbow on Freedom. He goes for another but Freedom rolls out of the way! Freedom scrambles to his feet, somehow, and gets to the corner. Wilcox charges in and Freedom gets the boots up. With Wilcox dazed, he turns around and begins to scale the turnbuckle.
Arthur La Forge: Freedom might have a chance here!
Mary DeSue: Don't turn your back on a giant though!
Wilcox immediately charges back in and grabs the smaller Freedom, who holds onto the turnbuckle for dear life. Wilcox is stronger, however, and yanks Freedom away, nearly yanking the turnbuckle pad off in the process! The momentum allows Freedom to slip down the back of Wilcox and immediately hit him with a chop block. Wilcox throws a wild back elbow, and Freedom ducks underneath and charges forward, then immediately has to stop himself because he almost collides with the post. He turns around and Wilcox rushes in again. Freedom tries to warn him away, but with no other options he hits a DROP TOE HOLD and Wilcox trips and falls headfirst into the top of the ring post! Wilcox then stumbles back and falls. Freedom climbs up top...IMPRESSIVE DISPLAY OF AGILITY! COVER!
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
Mr. Rad: HERE is your winner...PAUL FREEDOM!
Arthur La Forge: Amazing! It literally took nothing but agility and speed, and a mistake on the part of Drake Wilcox, but Paul Freedom gets the win!
Mary DeSue: HE GOT LUCKY! If Wilcox didn't stumble over his own feet...
Arthur La Forge: Mary, Paul used a drop toehold. But yes, he did capitalize on the momentum of Wilcox to help him trip the big man into that turnbuckle post.
Mary DeSue: IT SHOULD BE A DISQUALIFICATION!
Arthur La Forge: The ring post is part of the ring, Freedom had no control over where Wilcox would land.
Mary DeSue: Meh. I'm taking this up with my congressman.
Freedom immediately gets off of Drake Wilcox, who is already starting to stir, and slides out of the ring. He knows how lucky he got not to get mauled tonight and isn't ready to stick around and let that happen at this time. Instead, he moves through the crowd, celebrating his win with the fans.
---
Larry Tact vs. Ziggy Morgan Power Title Match
Ziggy doesn’t wait for Tact to get in the ring, instead he flies through the top two ropes and takes him out with a suicide dive! The Cowboy immediately heaves the Champion up and sends him into the guardrail. Ziggy throws in a few punches for good measure before hooking Tact’s arm and sending him up and over with a suplex on the ramp! Tact’s back smacks into the cold steel and he immediately grabs at it with his hand. Ziggy, riding the high of his early momentum, raises his arms and roars to the crowd, who start chanting…
COWBOY SHIT!
COWBOY SHIT!
COWBOY SHIT!
Arthur La Forge: Twitch hates this! Twitch hates this!
Mary DeSue: FOR ONCE I AGREE!!
Ziggy backs up, sizing up the leader of the Game Changers, who is slowly getting to his feet. Once Tact is up, Ziggy charges, running up the guard rail and looking for a SUPERMAN PUN-NO! TACT PANCAKES HIM WITH THE POWER CHAMPIONSHIP! Ziggy’s head collides violently first with the title and then with the ramp. Tact, who had managed to unhook the title from his waist before Ziggy flew into the air, takes a breather after enduring an onslaught from the "Caballo Diablo".
Arthur La Forge: Well…you can’t say that Larry Tact doesn’t know how to use that title to his full advantage.
Mary DeSue: It’s pretty and a weapon…such a fashionista.
Still, there’s an arrogance about him as he retrieves the fallen Ziggy and pulls him into a side-headlock. He takes aim at Ziggy’s forehead with some targeted right hands, keeping the headlock cinched in. Tact bounces Ziggy’s head off the apron, then takes him by the arm, putting all his strength behind a powerful irish whip that sends Ziggy headfirst into the steel ringpost! The Cowboy spins and crumples down next to the steel steps after that nasty blow. Ref Kirby shouts for Tact to get into the ring and actually get the match officially started, but Tact shouts at him to SHUT UP! Tact drills Ziggy’s head into the steps, then stands up on the apron. Smirking at the battered body beneath him, Tact raises his foot…AND STOMPS ON ZIGGY’S HEAD ON THE STEPS!
Arthur La Forge: Ziggy’s gonna have a scrambled brain if this keeps up.
Mary DeSue: It wasn’t already…like those eighties drug commercials with the frying pan.
Ziggy falls ass backwards, completely laid out after that sickening stomp. Satisfied, Tact finally obeys Ref Kirby’s orders and rolls Ziggy under the bottom rope and into the ring. The bell sounds as Tact pushes the lifeless body over and hooks the leg.
ONE!
TWO!
Ziggy kicks out.
Arthur La Forge: …HOW??!!
Mary DeSue: WHY???!!!
Ziggy shows some fight by kicking out, but his eyes look slightly glassy after the punishment he’s taken. The cowboy tries to crawl away but Tact grabs him by the leg and pulls him back to the center of the ring. Tact stands over him, then pulls his head up so it’s almost in the camel clutch position. Ziggy looks up at him, eyes wide, only to receive a nasty right hand to the back of his head that drops him right back down to the mat! Tact chuckles, then leads down to shout into his ear - “COME ON COWBOY!” The crowd loudly boo his actions but Larry could give a rats! Another right hand! This time Larry pulls Ziggy up by his hair, then holds him there half-way off the mat. “IS THIS YOUR BOY?!” Tact yells to the Level Up audience.
Arthur La Forge: Well the crowd is definitely behind Ziggy in this match!
Mary DeSue: Well they’re dumb…That’s the leader of “The Game Changers” and that…that is about to be a side order of street pizza.
Tact sits back on Ziggy’s back and locks in LARRY’S THRONE! He places tremendous strain on the cowboy’s neck and back as he wrenches back on his chin with his arms. Ziggy fights at first, but soon begins to fade…things are looking grim for his title aspirations. He’s almost limp in Tact’s arms when Kirby grabs him hand. He raises it into the air, and lets it fall to the mat…NO! HE’S NOT DONE YET! Ziggy’s hand almost collides with the canvas, but at the last moment he shows some life! His hand hovers there, then begins feeding on the energy on the crowd! Somehow Ziggy begins to power up, getting to one knee, then another. He manages to lift Tact up while he’s perched on his back, then drives him backfirst into the turnbuckle!
Arthur La Forge: Some fight left in the cowboy!
Mary DeSue: He just got lucky! That’s all!
Tact breaks his grip and Ziggy staggers forward, finally free. Tact charges out of the corner, looking to surprise Ziggy from behind, but Ziggy catches him with an elbow - expecting the sneak attack! Spinning around, Ziggy connects with a rolling elbow strike, and then an uppercut that sends Tact into the corner. He charges in and nails a running boot in the corner, then whips Tact to the other corner as hard as he can. Tact comes out of the corner from the impact and Ziggy bounces off the ropes, taking him out with a running DDT! He crawls over and covers Tact.
ONE!
TWO!
Tact kicks out.
Arthur La Forge: Tact almost lost the title there!
Mary DeSue: That was a fast count, Kirby!
Ziggy rolls out of the ring and begins fossicking under the ring while clutching the back of his head. He finds what he’s looking for…A BULLROPE! Ziggy wraps the rope around his fist and hops onto the apron, but Tact is there! He runs across the ring and shoulder charges Ziggy, causing him to fly off the apron and collide headfirst with the crowd barricade. Tact, also nursing a sore head, climbs out of the ring. Seeing the other end of the bullrope on the ground in front of Ziggy, Tact grabs it. He pulls it forward, pulling Ziggy along with it, and connects with a brutal lariat that turns Ziggy inside out!
Arthur La Forge: Welp…that bullrope just turned things up a notch.
Mary DeSue: THE SAFETY WORD IS MY ONLYFANS!
Arthur La Forge: That’s a bullrope not a sex rope!
Mar DeSue: Kinkshamer…
Tact wraps the other end of the bullrope around his fist, and pulls Ziggy back up to his feet. He pulls Ziggy to him, then lifts him up onto his shoulders - TORTURE RACK! Tact drives his shoulders into Ziggy’s back, then walks forward…TACTILISER ON THE APRON!! Ziggy bounces off the apron, his spine drilled into the hardest part of the ring. Tact quickly pulls up the cowboy, rolling him into the ring and following after him. He hooks the leg!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-NO!!
Ziggy just manages to roll his shoulder off the mat!
Arthur La Forge: Tact thought this was gonna be a lot easier and he’s just finding out that it’s gonna be a war!
Mary DeSue: A war to settle this snore…KNOCK HIS HEAD OF LARRY!
Tact is in disbelief, but Ziggy is showing some major resilience here! Still, it might not be enough, Tact is determined to end things here and now. Standing up, Tact ascends to the second rope in the corner. He pulls the rope again, dragging Ziggy over to the corner. Ziggy is barely on his knees after that brutal powerbomb. With Ziggy now in position, Tact goes for it, TACTFUL SURRENDER!! NO!! Ziggy braces himself and stops Tact from completing the journey, holding onto his legs! ZIGGY COUNTERS INTO AN ALABAMA SLAM!
Arthur La Forge: ALABAMA SLAM!!!
Mary DeSue: Holy S[bleep] what a move!
Ziggy falls to the mat, then wraps his end of the bullrope around Tact’s throat! He starts choking the big man out, his eyes afire with rage. He uncoks a few brutal right hand punches, then pulls Tact up…JOHNNY CASH’S WHITE SUIT! The rolling cutter drills Tact into the mat, and the crowd are going crazy, pulling for Ziggy to get the job done! The Caballo Diablo unwraps the bullrope from Tact’s arm, and instead warps the other end around Tact’s throat, tying it tight! He re-wraps the rope around his arm, then heads to the apron. Pulling Tact forward by the throat, he springs over the top rope - CLINT EASTWOOD! NO! Before he can connect, Tact falls to the ground - apparently too hurt to even stand!
Arthur La Forge: Ziggy’s fighting on a whole other level here!
Mary DeSue: Time out! Uncle! STOP THE MATCH!!
Shaking his head, Ziggy leans down to pull Tact back up…LOW BLOW! TACT WAS PLAYING POSSUM! Ziggy falls to the mat, clutching his testicles in agony. Tact unties the bullrope from around his neck, then pulls Ziggy over to the corner…TACTILLISER!! Tact hooks the leg!
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!!
DING DING DING!!
Mr Rad: Here is your winner…ANNNND STILL POWER CHAMPION…LARRYYYY TACT!!
Arthur La Forge: I AM GETTING SO TIRED OF LOW BLOWS!!
Mary DeSue: Then you should get off the internet. That’s usually the first shot.
Ziggy rolls out of the ring and is in a lot of pain as he looks around. Dejected he starts to head to back as suddenly he starts hearing a chant.
COWBOY ROCKS! COWBOY ROCKS! COWBOY ROCKS!!!
Ziggy holds up his arm and heads to the back. Still downtrodden, but leaves with his pride.
Arthur La Forge: If not for the cheating code of Larry Tact, Ziggy would have won that title tonight.
Mary DeSue: Then he should have known better Artie…
Following the Power title match, Larry is on the floor and uses the apron to pull himself up and lean against, breathing heavily. ISAAC and Drake arrive at his side and are checking on him when suddenly ELI GOODE and BRODY ADAMS appear at the entrance stage, the Multiplayer gauntlets on a fist apiece. ISAAC and Drake walk halfway up the ramp and begin exchanging trash talk with the Champs. Meanwhile, Larry sets himself upright and brushes some hair back from his face… only to look at a suddenly uproar from the crowd and finding PAUL FREEDOM hopping the crowd and making a beeline towards him! The two begin exchanging blows and Freedom sends Larry into the ringpost! ISAAC and Drake turn and begin heading towards Paul, but Eli and Brody come at them! The two teams begin brawling as well…
Arthur LaForge: The earlier brawl between these two groups has spilled over into the aftermath of the Power title match. Paul Freedom came out of the crowd like Bullet Bob!
Mary DeSue: Assuming that’s a nerd reference. Will ignore for your sake.
Freedom gets Larry’s arm hooked over his neck and executes a Snap Suplex to the floor! Larry’s back arches after the suffering he endured in the title match. ISAAC goes to drop Eli Goode on the stage ramp, but Eli wriggles out and lands a picture perfect Dropkick to the back of ISAAC that sends him stumbling into the crowd barrier to the side of the stage. Drake clubs Brody over the back and sends him to a knee, but Goode jumps on his back with a Sleeper Hold! Drake reaches up to grab Eli when Brody recovers and lands a shot to the knee of Drake that sends crashing down and the tag champs regroup. With great strength, they Double Suplex Drake onto the stage ramp! Back at ringside, Freedom gets Larry up again and runs him straight into the crowd barrier and the fans are riled up!
Mary DeSue: This is a straight up ambush on the Game Changers. Artie, call it!
Arthur LaForge: The Game Changers are the last ones who should complain, Mary. An answer to their actions has been simmering for weeks if not months, and it’s finally boiling over onto them.
Mary DeSue: But you call me bias?
Arthur LaForge: It’s an even fight here, and Level Up needs wrestlers to step up and challenge the Game Changers. It’s like the “Videolympics” when the N Team is finally revealed!
He points enthusiastically at his Captain N letterman’s jacket. Mary makes a grossed out face.
Mary DeSue: Don’t try to give me your Nerditis! Oh look, here’s the cavalry…
EAB is making his way down to the ring, briefcase in hand and he DECKS an unsuspecting Eli and Brody, who were focused on ISAAC. He then goes after Paul Freedom and takes a big swing but Paul ducks under! A Step Up Enziguri knocks the briefcase into EAB, staggering him. He drops the briefcase and Freedom backs up a few steps before charging… but EAB catches him and Larry joins him… Double Powerbomb to Paul Freedom on the floor! The pair join Drake and ISAAC to fight back against the Multiplayer Champs. Drake lifts Eli in a Military Press and tosses him to EAB who hits a high-angled Spinebuster to the floor. ISAAC has Brody in a stun gun position and launches him towards Larry who cuts him down with a Jumping High Knee. The crowd is giving a chorus of boos when…
Arthur LaForge: Now THIS is what I call reinforcements!
Mary DeSue: Whatever, keep your pants on, Artie…
The fans erupt as CENTURION comes bursting onto the ramp carrying a steel pipe! He sidesteps EAB and smashes him in the ribs, doubling Blizzard over. ISAAC grabs Cent by the head – HEADHUNTER!!! NO! CENT BOPS ISAAC WITH A PIPE SHOT TO THE CHEST! ISAAC goes down gasping for air. Larry spins Cent around and Cent swings wildly but LARRY IS WEARING BRASS KNUCKS! The two metals clash and Cent loses the pipe while Larry clutches his wrist and slips off the brass knucks, shaking his hand… Centurion with a V Trigger! He turns and sees ISAAC getting up and goes for BLOOD SYMPHONY but ISAAC catches Cent! Drake comes from behind… Double Powerbomb of Cent onto the ramp!
Mary DeSue: Ha! Who else wants to get mashed by the BIG MEATY MEN SLAPPIN’ MEAT! The Game Changers rule Level Up!
Arthur LaForge: I hate to say it, Mary, but there’s no denying the cohesiveness of the Game Changers. It may only be a matter of time before…
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUnRsn25SkA
Arthur LaForge: WAIT A MINUTE! DIONYSUS! DIONYSUS IS BACK!!
Mary DeSue: Didn’t the Game Changers already take care of Big Beard? Does he want another beatdown?
Arthur LaForge: With what they did to Dionysus, I think it’s the Game Changers who may be in trouble.
Dionysus appears to the ROAR of the crowd! He isn’t alone, either, with a steel chair in hand. He meets ISAAC on the apron and swiftly lands a chair shot to his gut! A second across the back! Drake is on top of him quickly but Dionysus stings him in the knee with the chair, sending Drake down to a knee and Dion… tosses Drake the chair? SHINING WIZARD to Drake! Dion immediately LEAPS ONTO THE CROWD BARRIER AND FLIES OFF WITH A LIONSAULT TO COMPLETE THE ROUND OF APPLAUSE!!
Arthur LaForge: He’s on fire! Dionysus is here and running a Game Changers gauntlet!
Mary DeSue: Yeah no, Artie. He’s about to get pummeled by the true, rightful champions!
EAB comes at Dionysus with the briefcase and Dion picks up the chair, creating a standoff. EAB TOSSES THE BRIEFCASE TO LARRY WHO WAS DUCKED BESIDE THE STAGE RAMP! TACT GOES FOR A HEADSHOT! DION PARRIES WITH THE CHAIR! Both weapons go clattering to the ramp and as Larry watches, shocked, The Lord of the Vine hits an STO BACKBREAKER!! EAB comes in and grabs Dionysus from behind in a Full Nelson and… CENTURION COMES IN WITH A STEEL CHAIR TO BLIZZARD’S BACK! EAB releases Dion who turns and lands HANDS OF AGGRESSION!! The Punching Combo ends decisively with a hook that sends EAB off the entrance ramp to the floor! Larry is getting back up and Dionysus lift him onto his back… FINAL CURTAIN!!! The Spinning Death Valley Driver sends Larry CRASHING TO THE RAMP IN AGONY!!
Dionysus heads into the ring and is followed by Centurion, Eli Goode, Brody Adams, and Paul Freedom. Centurion holds his arms up in the air while the other four each climb a turnbuckle and they all pose to an ERUPTION OF CHEERS!
Arthur LaForge: This is what Level Up has been waiting for. A group to stand up and fight back against the Game Changers!
Mary DeSue: A disgusting act of rebellion! The Game Changers are working to bring Level Up to the best it can be, and these bozos are trying to ruin it all.
The Game Changers are getting back up, marching towards the ring when the Level Up Tron lights up and Mr. Rad appears on the screen.
Mr. Rad: Hold it right there, Game Changer Meatsacks! I’ve just received word straight from The Developer. This has to end and it’s time to settle the score between these two groups. So, at the DOOM Pay-Per-View, it will be… WAR GAMES!!!
Mary DeSue: WHAT?!?
Arthur LaForge: MOTHER BRAIN!! A War Games match to settle the score!
Mary DeSue: No but, I’m seriously asking, Artie… what’s a War Games?
Larry’s is getting HEATED as he shouts at Mr Rad, with EAB doing his best to settle Tact down. ISAAC and Drake are legit tearing the covering off the barriers in rage while the group in the ring is applauding and further playing to the crowd.
Mr. Rad: The Developer realizes that there is a discrepancy in the numbers… the Game Changers are a team of four while the opposition looks to have a full five players. To that, Larry, we say… better get cracking and find a fifth member! If not, I guess it’ll be a HANDICAP WAR GAMES!
The crowd endorses that idea with more cheers, while Tact is shaking, his face turning beet red. The screen blips out and the Game Changers stare down their DOOM opponents in the ring, deciding to make their way backstage.
---
EA Blizzard vs. Kat Jones Courage Title
DING! DING! DING!
The main event kicks off with EAB standing face to face with Kat Jones. EAB lunges towards Kat, and she rolls to the side and hits the ropes. On the rebound she hits a spinning heel kick to the face of EAB, which makes him stumble a bit. Kat, wasting no time, gets behind EAB and hits the ropes going for a bulldog to take him down to the mat. Kat quickly slaps on a figure four leglock onto EAB in the center of the ring!
Arthur La Forge: Break his freaking knee!
Mary DeSue: Bias! Bias! I say!
Referee Kirby ask EAB if he wants to quit and EAB responds by shoving him away and trying to turn over. Kat keeps the hold locked in and EAB reaches back, but can’t reach the ropes. He pushes himself up with his arms and crawls backwards, finally grabbing the ropes. Kirby tells Kat to release the hold. She does, but not before getting up and drop kicking EAB in the face. She picks up EAB and tosses him into the ropes. Going for another spinning heel kick, EAB ducks and hits the rebound. BIG BOOT TO THE FACE! Kat Jones is down and EAB picks her up. He puts her in his bear hug submission hold Crunch Time!
Arthur La Forge: Come on Kat! You gotta get out of that hold!
Mary DeSue: Maybe EAB just wanted to give her a hug. You ever think of that? You ever just realize he’s a kind man trying to bring out the best in people.
Kat is getting wrenched and squeezed as EAB laughs, but not for long as Kat starts bringing her elbow into the eyes of EAB. WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! He finally drops her, holding his left eye as Kat runs to the ropes and dropkicks him in the knee. She picks up EAB and quickly hits a Freaked Out Snap DDT! EAB rolls out of the ring after the hit to try and catch a breather as Kat runs to the ropes and dives thru the second one. She grabs EAB and takes him down with a tornado DDT to the outside!
One…
Two…
Both competitors are down, but Kat is starting to get up.
Three…
She picks up EAB and he returns the favor by picking her up and body slamming Kat Jones onto the ring barrier!
Four…
Five…
EAB tosses Kat Jones thru the second rope back into the ring and then gets in. He reaches down and grabs Kat by the throat and lifts her up with both hands. She then kicks EAB in the face! EAB drops her and he stumbles to his corner. Kat grabs EAB’s leg and goes for another figure four leglock, but he kicks her in the rear and sends her to the other side of the ring. EAB gets up and charges at Kat going for a Lariat, but Kat leaps up and catches EAB in an armbar takedown! EAB quickly grabs the ropes and breaks the hold. Kat gets up and hits the ropes as EAB gets up. He goes for a clothesline, but she ducks it. Superkick from Kat sends EAB into the corner…right where the briefcase is. Kat calls for The Kat-astrophe finisher and goes to grab EAB. She doesn’t see he has his briefcase…JUST COSMETIC! in front of the referee! Kirby calls for the bell!
Mr. Rad: Here is your winner…by disqualification…Kat Jones!
Arthur La Forge: Kat’s won the match but she didn’t get the title! This is so not fair! It’s like these guys have all the cheat codes to not let the better wrestler win!
Mary DeSue: Isn’t winning enough. Wasn’t it nice that EAB gave her a win for trying to so hard. I guess he was just smarter than Kat this week.
Kat Jones is naturally upset and is livid as she gets up holding her jaw from the briefcase shot. EAB smiles and points to his head as he carries his Courage Title and dented briefcase back up the rampway.
Arthur La Forge: That man is gonna push his luck one too many times. Mark my words.
Mary DeSue: Oh please Artie…don’t be so bitter.
---
We cut to a parking and loading area of the arena, where the Game Changers are stewing after the events of the night. Drake is standing next to a crate, which has a fist-shaped hole in it. ISAAC is pushing his fists together. Larry Tact has a cell phone in hand, two fingers pressing on a Bluetooth earpiece.
Larry Tact: Hey, apparently the Developer decided to make their move. More than that, they want to stack the odds against us – literally! … Yes, Mr. Rad confirmed a five-on-five WAR GAMES match for DOOM. How outrageous is that?! I was expecting a night off, and instead we’re getting punished for lifting this company on our shoulders to greater heights. But I bet the Developer was savoring these yokel fans’ reaction. … Why? Well, it appeared we only had four to the five we’ll be facing… Centurion, Dionysus, Eli Goode, Brody Adams, and Paul Freedom. Little do they know, I’m taking care of that, momentarily. See, I knew this ‘resistance’ or whatever they want to be called has been gathering arms. I knew it was only a matter of time before this came to a head in the ring. I didn’t expect it for DOOM, but I suppose it’s serendipitous that I invited a special guest to stop by. We were going to sit down for a little chat, and…
In the near distance, we hear the sound of a vehicle peeling into the straightaway that leads to the parking area. Tact turns, looking at the approaching figure.
Larry Tact: I think they just arrived. Talk to you later…
He taps the earpiece and pockets the phone. The rumble of a late model Harley grows louder as it approaches, the figure on the bike can’t be seen right at first but then the speed of the motorcycle brings the figure more into focus. He approaches the Game Changers at a high rate of speed and then comes to a halt merely inches from Larry Tact, who looks unamused. The other Game Changers rush up around Tact, ready to confront this person, but Larry stops them.
Mac Bane: I’ve got pounds of flesh to collect, just point me in the right direction and I’ll solve your little problem.
The crowd gasps audibly at MAC BANE’S appearance as Larry’s face turns into a sinister grin and we fade to black.
